I Want You
by iimpulsive
Summary: To Lily, James had never been anything more than an arrogant, immature bully, but during their seventh year, what happened to change her mind about him? Was it his new found maturity? Or just his new girlfriend sparking a jealousy in her?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing. Credit goes to Ms. Rowling.

Chapter 1: Welcome Home

Light came through the window in thick beams, sun shining brightly outside on this day, September the first. Any other morning, she would have closed the blinds to shut the sun away, but today was a special day, the kind of day that needed to be started bright and early. Today was the day that Lily Evans would return to Hogwarts for her seventh and final year.

Stretching her arms over her head with a grin on her face, she glanced at the clock whose bright red numbers flashed nine thirty. She swung her legs over the side of her bed, yawning and running a hand through her tousled mane of fiery hair. She quickly hopped to her feet and crossed the length of her room in a few long strides. When she pulled the oak door open, she found herself face to face with a very pale, horse-faced girl.

"Good morning, Petunia." Lily smiled. Even at the sight of her wretched older sister, her mood couldn't be ruined.

"Mum told me to come wake you. She says you need to eat breakfast before you go." She sighed before turning on her heel to walk back down the stairs and into the kitchen.

Practically leaping down the stairs three at a time, Lily was on her heels. In their tiny blue and white kitchen, an older woman was standing in front of the stove. She turned around when Lily entered. She was rather short, almost identical to Lily but with dark blue eyes and laugh lines and creases around her eyes.

"Pancakes are on the table, dear." Virginia Evans smiled as her daughter kissed her on the cheek.

"Thanks mum." Lily replied, sitting at the table next to her father and across from her sister. Even as she ate, she couldn't wipe the smile off her face. Her father seemed to notice this, and chuckled.

"It seems our Lily is happy to be leaving us, today, Gin." He grinned. He was an older looking man, his brown hair beginning to turn grey, but when he smiled, Lily saw the youth in him. His eyes, exactly like his daughters, were bright emerald green.

"She always is, Tom. She's like this every year." Her mother said, now moving to the kitchen sink to wash the dishes.

"But this year's different." Lily interrupted. "This year is my _last_ year."

"Ah, of course! Which means it should be your best one." He father grinned and Lily nodded in response as she finished up her breakfast.

"You best get upstairs and get dressed, Lily. What would your headmaster think if the Head Girl showed late on their first day back?" her mother said, taking the empty plate from her daughter's hands and placing it into the sink. With that, Lily hurried back up the stairs and into her room.

She quickly dressed and fastened her wild hair in a ponytail before gathering the last of her school things together in a pile by the door. She thrust her wand into her back pocket, eyed her pale, freckled reflection in her mirror again and set off down the stairs on her way to the family car. Throwing her things into the trunk and climbing into the backseat next to her sister, Lily was on her way to platform 3 ¾ for the last time.

They had only been driving for a few moments when she felt Petunia's glaring eyes on her.

"What?" Lily asked, turning to look her in the face.

"I don't need to get out of the car, do I?" she asked, her arms folded over her chest.

Lily sighed. "Honestly, Petunia, do you ever need to get out of the car?" she said "Why would this year be any different? I've already managed to convince everyone that I was an only child, I wouldn't want to ruin that."

Petunia opened her mouth to utter a vicious reply, but upon seeing the look her father was giving her in the rear-view mirror, she wisely decided against it.

Satisfied, Lily went back to staring out her window.

It wasn't long before the Evans family reached the station. Mr. and Mrs. climbed out of the car, leaving Petunia to sulk in the back seat. Her father went to fetch Lily's trunk, but she stopped him.

"Dad, I can carry that." Lily objected, watching her father struggle to lift her trunk.

"Now, now…this is your last year and my last chance to see you off _properly_. Just let me carry it to the platform." He replied, closing the car's trunk with one hand and dragging Lily's things along with the other.

Together, Lily and her parents disappeared stealthily through the barrier to platform 9 ¾ and made their way through the throng of students and anxious parents. Soon they were standing in front of the train and Virginia bent to hug her daughter.

"Oh, Lily, we'll miss you terribly." She said into her ear.

"I'll miss you, too, mum." Lily replied, moving to give her father a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"I'd say 'make us proud', Lil', but you already have." He told her and Lily beamed.

"I'll see you at Christmastime." She told her parents before turning and boarding the train behind another group of students.

It was always hard to find an empty compartment on the Hogwarts Express, but Lily knew that her three friends were sitting in one somewhere, saving her a seat. She pictured their faces in her mind and smiled, pushing lightly through the crowds in the corridor. Finally, she found them, laughing together in a compartment at the front of the train. She opened the door with one hand, dragging her trunk in the other and immediately found herself being crushed with hugs.

"Lily Billy!" Victoria shouted, nearly jumping into her arms. "What's taken you so long? You're usually here early!"

Victoria was tall, taller than Lily and the rest of their friends, with dark blond hair and brown eyes, tanned skin and a sparkling stud in her nose.

"What are you saying? I'm never here early!" Lily replied, beaming as she sat down.

"That's true." Victoria reminisced. "Anna's the one that's here early every year."

Anna beamed from her seat next to Lily. "It's not my fault I live like…five minutes away from Kings Cross." She laughed. She was very pale, whiter than Lily was, with light blue eyes and her dark brown hair was wild and curly. She was tiny and very pixie-like.

Last of the group was Louise, who sat next to Victoria with her legs folded up on the seat. She was average height and curvy, with long black hair pulled into a braid and dark brown eyes. She smiled at Lily, her braces glittering. "Have you had a nice summer, Lils?" she asked.

Lily shrugged. "It was okay. Nothing out of the ordinary." It was then that she glanced at her watch. "Blast!" she cursed. "I want to know how your summers were as well, but I've got a meeting to get to for now. Promise you'll tell me everything when I get back?"  
"Meeting?" Anna asked. "What meeting?"

"Oh, right…I've been made Head Girl." She said, jumping out to retrieve the pin from her trunk.

"That was obvious." Victoria said, exchanging looks with Louise, which Lily didn't miss.

"What?" she asked, fastening her pin to her shirt.

"Have you heard who the Head Boy is?" Anna asked.

"No, I haven't. But I'll find out soon, I guess, won't I?" Lily said turning to leave.

"I think you should be warned." Victoria said in a singsong voice.

"Why?" Lily asked, stopping at the door. "He can't possibly be that bad. Dumbledore's not crazy; he'd never pick some one--"

"It's James Potter." Louise interrupted quickly.

"Has Dumbledore completely lost his mind!?!" Lily nearly shouted.

"I did say that you should be warned." Victoria reminded her.

Lily found she was breathing heavily, leaning against the door. "That's impossible. No way would…_he_ be made Head Boy."

"It's true, Lily Billy." Anna said sadly.

"Go find out for yourself." Victoria added.

Lily glanced at her watch again. She was half thinking of completely skipping the meeting, avoiding what could only be a disaster. But she quickly threw that idea out of her mind and left the compartment, practically stomping down the corridor until she found the right compartment.

Inside she saw a number of new prefects and several old ones that she recognized including Remus Lupin who sat laughing with – gulp – James Potter. Realizing she was the last to arrive, she entered the compartment smiling sheepishly in apology.

"Nice way to start of as Head Girl, mudblood, showing up late to the first meeting." Corey Coil, a sixth year Slytherin, hissed from the corner of the compartment.

"Shut up, Coil." James snapped at him.

Lily ignored them both and sat down on Remus' other side, preparing herself for the worst.

The meeting went relatively well and was over in almost no time at all. Both James and Lily read the rules to the prefects off the papers they had had sent to them that summer, and then they were off. Actually, Lily was surprised at James' behaviour. Not a single rude comment, not a single crude joke, he simply did what he was supposed to do. It was different and she found that she rather liked the new, more mature James Potter. If that was really was he was.

The Head Boy and Girl were the last to leave, Lily shuffling her papers into order and James standing by the door watching her. When she looked up, he was still standing there. She gave him a curious look, but he only smiled in return.

"How was your summer, Evans?" He asked as they both finally left the compartment.

Taken by surprise, Lily peered up at him. "Fine, thank you."

"Good to hear." He said, blissfully ignoring the suspicious look she was giving him.

She was waiting for what she knew was going to come. James Potter couldn't go a minute without rumpling his hair, or making fun of some one or finding a new way to make himself look like some kind of king. Nor could he go without asking Lily out every chance he had. This time, she was going to stop him before he got the chance.

"Look, Potter, I'm going to tell you this once and I hope you remember it. I do not want to go out –"

But she was interrupted by a pretty blond girl calling his name from down the corridor. Distracted, she looked towards the source of the noise. The girl was smiling and walking this way, and when she was finally standing with them, she slipped her arm around his waist and he slipped his arm around her. She was tall and slim with shoulder length blond hair and hazel eyes. Again, Lily found that she was surprised.

"Uh…Lily, this is Claire Austen. Claire, baby, this is Lily." He said.

"Nice to meet you." Lily said, smiling at her.

"Nice to meet you too." Claire replied, beaming.

"Well, I've…got to go, now. I'll…I'll see you around." Lily said, quickly turning on her heel. But she stopped when James called out to her.

"Wait! Lily! Weren't you just saying something before?" he asked, staring at her curiously.

She thought back to what she had planned on saying, and now, it somehow seemed unnecessary. She quickly shook her head. "No, it was nothing. Nothing."

Author's Note: There we are. The first chapter of many to come. I hope it was okay. As always, please read and reviewww.

Thanks for reading.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Own next to nothing. Yada, yada, yada.

Author's Note: Know what I hate? That silly three-day wait until I can upload my stories because I'm new. So while I was waiting for my time to be up, I decided to type up chapter two.

Chapter 2: Changes

"That was quick." Louise said, surprised as she looked up from her magazine and saw Lily standing by the door.

The three girls exchanged looks as Lily sat down and looked out the window.

"How'd it go?" Victoria asked.

Lily shrugged. "It went fine. All we really had to do was give the prefects their duties."

Victoria sighed. "Come on, Lil, you know that's not what I meant."

"How'd it go with James?" Anna clarified when Lily didn't answer.

"It went fine." She said, shaking her head with a smile on her face. "He did what he was supposed to do and then we were off."

Victoria looked dumbfounded. "How many times did he ask you out?"

"Oh, hang on, let me count." Lily said, rolling her eyes. "Oh, yeah! Zero."

"Zero?!" Louise said, looking at her with her eyes wide.

"Zero." Lily said, grinning at the looks on her friends' faces. "As a matter of fact, he has a girlfriend."  
"No way!"

"You can't be serious!"

Lily just nodded. "A very pretty girl by the name of Claire Austen." She elaborated.

Victoria folded her arms over her chest stubbornly. "I don't believe you."

"Suit yourself." Lily muttered, waving her off with her hand and resuming her staring contest with the window while her three friends exchanged suspicious looks.

--

"She seemed nice." Claire said conversationally as she and James returned to their compartment. "I'd never actually spoken to her before."

James nodded with a smile. "Yeah, she is."

He slid the door open and let her step in before he did. Three other boys looked up as they did so.

"What took you so long, Prongs? Moony's been back for ages now." Sirius Black said, grinning up at them.

"Hung back, talking to Evans." He shrugged. The boys exchanged looks as he and Claire sat on the bench across from them.

"What did she have to say?" Remus asked, looking back to the Exploding Snap game he had started with Sirius. Peter sat on his left, eyeing the game with interest.

"Nothing much. I asked her how her summer was." James shrugged again.

Sirius was now laughing to himself. "What did she say when she found out that _you_ were Head Boy?" he asked.

James shook his head. "She didn't say anything, actually." He said, looking puzzled now as he thought back. It was odd that she hadn't said anything about it. "I guess her friends warned her."  
"They must have." Remus said. "I'll bet she had a heart attack when she found out."

"You never got along, did you?" Claire asked, peering between the boys.

"Naw, Evans has had it in for Prongsie since he introduced himself in first year." Sirius replied.

"Why?" she asked, quirking her eyebrows. "What did you do?"

James feigned innocence. "I didn't do anything." He said

Remus snorted. "You turned her hair green and wouldn't change it back until Professor McGonagall made you."

"That's practically nothing." James said defensively, though he found that he was smiling mischievously at the memory.

Claire laughed. "You were terrible!" she accused, swatting him playfully on the arm.

"Hey!" James said, pretending to be hurt.

"You were!" she argued, laughing.

It was then that the Express came to a stop.

"We've arrived." Sirius grinned.

"Way to state the obvious, Padfoot." James snorted. Sirius punched him in the arm.

Together, the Marauders and Claire gathered their things and made their way out of the compartment. The crowds of black clad students moved slowly towards the horseless carriages, trying to find an empty one to ride in. Remus led them to the front where finally they were able to squeeze themselves into a carriage.

James sighed as they started up the path to the school.

Claire gave him a curious look. "What?" she asked.

"This is the last time we'll be riding up to the feast in a tiny, uncomfortable carriage." He said sadly.

"You're right." Sirius agreed. "It's our last year."

--

The Sorting had already finished. Petrified looking first years stumbled up to the stool to have the hat whisper their fate in their ears. Some of them looked happy as they skipped off to their tables, others looked gloomy as they trudged their way to tables, away from their friends or siblings. When the process was through, Albus Dumbledore rose to his feet and held his arms out in welcome.

"Welcome to our new students, and to our old students, welcome back." He began his speech, followed by a quick list of rules and guidelines, and of course, his usual tidbit of completely useless wisdom and the students were soon sent off to bed. First years followed their house prefects up to their new common rooms, while the older students walked up in flocks of two or three or four.

James made to get up with the rest of the Marauders and Claire, when he was stopped by Professor McGonagall waving him down. Sirius and Claire both turned around to see what the hold-up was.

Shrugging, James dropped a kiss on the top of Claire's head and nodded at Sirius. "Go on, I'll see you later." He told them, turning to walk over to the professor. That was when he noticed that Lily was standing next to her, looking as confused as he felt.

"What's up, professor?" James asked, joining them with his hands in his pockets.

"I'm to show you to the Heads' Dorm, that is what is up, Mr. Potter." She replied curtly, sweeping past them. "Follow me."

Obediently, they followed along behind her. James chanced a glance over at Lily, whose expression was unreadable. Was she worried about sharing a common room with him?

Finally, Professor McGonagall came to a stop in front of the portrait of a fat old man. She quickly muttered the password, and the portrait swung forward on its hinges. James and Lily followed her as she proceeded into the room.

The walls were painted in the Gryffindor colours: deep scarlet and light gold. James imagined that the colours changed every year, according the Head Boy and Girls' houses. Portraits and paintings lined the walls, some of their subjects moving along in their frames to get a better glimpse at who would be staying in the rooms this year. There was a fireplace on the left side of the room, situated between two doors. There was also a desk, a table, a leather couch and chair, just like the ones in the old Gryffindor common room.

"I'll leave you to get acquainted with the rooms and I expect to see you in class on time tomorrow morning, right Mr. Potter?" Professor McGonagall told them, giving James a stern look.

He grinned sheepishly as she excused herself, the portrait swinging closed behind her. When he turned back, he found Lily was staring at him.

"Nice place, huh?" he said, running a hand through his hair nervously.

"Yeah, it is." She agreed, smiling slightly as she finally looked away. James breathed a sigh of relief; he felt as though he had been shrinking under her stare.

He watched as she crossed the room to the window, peered through the glass, then walked over to one of the doors. James followed her, and as he stood behind her, he saw that her name was painted onto the door. He glanced at the other one, and sure enough, saw his name printed there.

"Well, I better be off to bed, then." He said, looking down at her as she turned to look up at him. "Especially if I have to be in class on time tomorrow morning." He added with a smile and a wink. He was surprised to hear her laugh. He had always loved that laugh…

"Night, Potter." She said, pushing her own door open.

"Night, Evans." He replied, but she had already gone and the door was closed behind her.

--

Lily wasn't sure if it was the excitement of being back at Hogwarts, or something else inside of her that was keeping her from sleeping. She lay awake in her bed, twirling her hair around her fingers as she stared up at the ceiling. She wasn't sure if she minded being awake or not, though. She knew she _should_ be asleep if she wanted to be on time tomorrow, but she also wanted time to think about the many things that she had to think about. One of these things was coming back more than the others, however: The change in James Potter. He had always been so arrogant, so immature, so impossible, but something about him was different this year. She couldn't put her finger on it, but something had changed, and she found that she wasn't complaining in the slightest.

Author's Note: Chapter two? Check. You may have noticed that there is little Peter action in the chapter, and I should probably tell you that there will be very little Peter action throughout the whole story, unless I need him for something. Sorry to any Pettigrew lovers out there. As always, read and reviewww.

Thanks for reading.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Own next to nothing. Sheesh.

Author's Note: When I start a new story, I tend to get obsessed and keep writing whenever I get bored. I'm bored; here's chapter three. :

Chapter 3: Friends.

The alarm clock sang to her as the numbers flashed seven o'clock in red. Groaning, Lily rolled over to slap her hand down on top of it and the noise abruptly stopped. As much as she wished she could stay in bed for a few more hours, she knew she needed to get up and get to Herbology.

Quickly, she got out of bed and looked around her room. She spotted her robes on the dresser in the far corner. Grudgingly she crossed the room and grabbed them, dressing in silence. She then ran a brush through her hair, tied it in its usual ponytail, brushed her teeth and gathered her Herbology things, leaving them in an organized pile for when she came back up to fetch them after breakfast. As she did this, she heard a distant humming from outside her room. Curious, she walked out to the door and opened it to see James sprawled on the couch.

He sat up when he heard the door close. "Morning." He said, smiling.

Lily nodded with a quick smile and made for the portrait. She heard James leap to his feet behind her and hurry to catch up.

"D'you sleep well?" he asked as they both walked along to the Great Hall.

She shrugged. "Well enough." She lied. In truth, she'd tossed and turned all night, unable to fall asleep.

"That's good." James said, though he sensed that it wasn't the truth.

They had reached the Great Hall, and Lily seized the moment to dash over to where her friends were sitting. Watching her disappear, James sighed and walked over to where Sirius and Remus were sitting.

"Morning sunshine." Sirius greeted him as he sat down.

James nodded. "Seen Claire?" he asked.

Remus shook his head. "Not since last night, no." He peered at his friend curiously. "What's up mate?" he asked.

Sirius nodded in agreement with Remus. "Yeah, you're not your usual perky yourself."

"I'm going to guess that it's got something to do with Evans." Remus said, glancing at Sirius.

"Good guess." James said, helping himself to toast and pumpkin juice.

"What is it this time?" Sirius asked, reaching to take a piece of the toast off James' plate.

James slapped his hand. "I _was_ going to see if we could be friends this year, but she's avoiding me."

"Friends?" Remus asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Yes, friends, but she doesn't seem to want anything to do with me." James said, looking puzzled as he lazily poked at his breakfast.

"Give her some time." Remus said "Let her get used to the new you."

Sighing, James nodded, taking a swig of pumpkin juice. Sirius seized the opportunity to take the last piece of his toast while his hands were occupied. James choked on his drink and put the glass down. Sirius laughed, chewing triumphantly on his toast.

"Git." James laughed.

--

"Why are you staring at him?" Louise asked as Lily glanced over at James for the third time.

"I'm not staring!" Lily protested. "I'm…looking."

"You're staring, Lily Billy. Just tell us why." Victoria said as she took a bite out of the apple in her hand.

Admitting defeat, Lily sighed. "Have you noticed anything different about him?"

Anna and Louise shook their heads. "No, nothing." Anna said, peering down the table at him curiously.

"Hmm." Lily said thoughtfully, rolling an apple around in the palms of her hands. "He's acting differently. I'm sure of it."

"Why do you say that?" Anna asked.

After thinking for a moment, Lily laughed before she replied. "Because I haven't felt the need to slap him yet. It's been a whole day, it's a record."

"Be nice, Lily." Victoria told her, though she was laughing. "Maybe he just grew up."

"Maybe." Lily said, narrowing her eyes at him as if it would change the way he looked. "Hopefully." She added, then began to get to her feet, finally taking a bite out of her apple. "Come on, Herbology first, and I want to show you my room." She smiled and with that the four of them left the Hall arm in arm.

--

"Mind if I sleep in here with you from now on?" Anna laughed as she bounced on Lily's bed.

"Sleep in here? You mean _live_ in here." Victoria corrected her. "I don't think I'll ever leave."

Lily shook her head, a smile on her face from ear to ear. "You know the password. Come and visit me whenever you want."

Anna opened her mouth to reply, but Lily had turned away, not paying attention. She had heard somebody knocking at the portrait. She walked out of her room and crossed the common room. She pushed the portrait open and found Claire standing on the other side, her blond hair in braids today. She smiled shyly.

"Come in." Lily said, stepping aside.

Claire clambered in and thanked Lily. "Is James here?" she added.

Lily shook her head, frowning. "No, but I saw him in the Great Hall at breakfast."

"I must have missed him." Claire sighed. "I just checked."

"Lily! Where'd you get to?" Louise called as the three girls emerged from Lily's room. "Oh!" she said, upon seeing what had dragged Lily away. "Who's this?"

"Claire, these are my friends, Louise, Anna and Victoria. Guys, this is Claire." Lily shot them a meaningful look and Victoria grinned.

"Nice you meetchya." She said, walking towards them. Claire nodded. "We have Herbology first, too." Victoria added, seeing the books in Claire's arms. "Walk with us."

Victoria linked her arm with Claire's and Lily's and the other girls joined on either side.

"So, Claire, tell us, what's it like dating one of the famous Marauders?" Anna asked, leaning over Victoria.

Claire shrugged with a small smile. "It's…interesting. It's never boring, that's for sure." She laughed.

"I can imagine. Don't you ever find yourself overwhelmed with the desire to kick one of them?" Louise grinned.

"Sometimes. And more often than not, that desire is aimed at Sirius." Claire said, and they all laughed.

They crossed the Hogwarts grounds and found themselves at the greenhouses. The filed into the classroom just in time and found their usual seats. The chatter ceased as Professor Fern stepped up to the front of the class, wearing robes of bright purple and green.

"Good morning, class. I understand that this is your last year of Herbology?" There was a collective grumble from the students and she continued. "Don't let that fool you into thinking that this class is going to be easy, however. On that note, I will explain to you your first assignment."  
Together, the class groaned. At the back of the room, some one called out "Already?!" and it sounded very much like it had come from Sirius. The students took a moment out of their complaining to laugh.

"Settle down, settle down." Professor Fern shouted. "Now, in a moment, you will be put into pairs, and they have already been made, so don't bother picking out your partners now. You and your partner will be researching a magical plant that is used in healing. You will be writing up a report about it and you will also be growing your own plant. This will be a year-long project, because the plants will need to mature fully and you will need to study and observe it carefully."

"Imagine being stuck with a lousy partner for the entire year?" Victoria whispered to Lily "If I get stuck will some one dreadful, promise to kill me quickly?"

Lily snickered.

"Miss Rice and Miss Bright, you will work together." Professor Fern recited. Louise and Anna beamed and moved their chairs closer together and began reading their books. "Miss Finnegan," Victoria groaned "you will be paired with Mr. Pettigrew. Mr. Lupin with Mr. Black, and please Remus, try to keep him under control this year. Mr. Potter and Miss Evans. Miss Austen and Mr. Craig…"

She continued to recite names off of her list, but Lily stopped paying attention. Of course. She _had_ to be paired with _him_. The teachers must assume that the Head Boy and Girl work best together. Boy, did Lily have news for them…

"You promised to kill me quickly, remember?" Victoria reminded her.

"I didn't promise you anything." Lily laughed, getting to her feet as Peter walked up to the front and sat in Lily's empty seat.

She walked to the back and sat down next to James, Sirius having moved to the seat in front of her, next to where Remus was sitting.

"Any ideas, partner?" James asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Off the top of my head, no." Lily said, opening her book and beginning to flip through the pages.

"Chapter three." James told her.

Lily looked up in surprise. "You read the book!?" she asked.

James laughed at the look on her face. "Not quite," he smiled "I read the table of contents."

Smiling, Lily flipped to chapter three and began to read. James leaned over her arm to read the page she was looking at. Lily started slightly at the shock that coursed through her arm and hoped that he hadn't noticed.

"W-what do you want to do?" she asked, looking up at him.

He was still reading the page, his head cocked to one side. "I kind of like this one." He said, pointing to the last paragraph on the page.

She looked down and began to read the page a loud, more for her own benefit than his. "Tickle Lilies are often used in strong Laughter Serums. Used in hospitals to make patients laugh, because some healers stand by the saying that a bit of laughter can cure any ailment." She paused, before adding "I like it."  
James smiled. "That's settled then." He said, closing the book and placing it back with her other ones. "We can get the seeds next time we go into Hogsmeade."  
Lily nodded. "I can do some research this weekend." She told him.  
"How about I meet you in the library on Sunday afternoon?" he asked, staring at her.

"You don't have to." She told him, surprised yet again by the changes in him.

"It's _our_ project. I'm going to help." He smiled and Lily found herself smiling back. But then his smile was gone, and a serious look appeared on his face. "Lily, I know we didn't get on very well in the past, but well…that was in the past, and I think that we should start over."

He said all this very quickly. Lily was surprised that she understood. "Start over?"

"Do you think that maybe this year, we could be friends?" he clarified.

After a few moments thought, Lily tilted her head to one side. "Promise not to go back to your old ways?"

"Promise. Cross my heart and hope to die. Well, not really, seeing as I'm rather enjoying my life…" He smiled, holding out his hand with she shook, smiling slightly.

"Alright then. Friends." She said.

--

"Friends?" Remus asked that night as they sat with them in the Heads' common room. He kept his voice quiet; he heard Lily and her friends laughing from her room.

"Yeah." James grinned.

Sirius gave him a curious look. "Are you sure that's all you want, mate?"

James returned his look. "What do you mean?"

"It's just that you've been obsessed with Evans for years. It seems weird that you just gave up all of a sudden." Sirius said.

"It's just better this way." James shrugged, but that night as he lay awake in his bed, Sirius' words came back to him. Was it_ really_ better this way? Had he really given up on Lily? He pictured her pale, freckled face in his mind, her beautiful green eyes staring back him and found himself unsure for a moment. _It's better this way,_ he told himself, _Liking Lily never got me anywhere. But now, I have a girlfriend that likes me for me, and I don't have to worry about Evans anymore._ He fell asleep with this thought fresh in his mind, whether it was because it was true, or because he didn't want to believe anything else.

--

Once again, sleep did not come easily to Lily. She lay on her side, facing the wall, thinking back to this morning and the day's events. A year ago, had anyone told her that she'd become friends with _the_ James Potter, she'd have recommended hospitalization. But as of today, it was true. They had become friends, and yet Lily couldn't help but miss the attention he used to give her. At the time, she had thought it was annoying and completely childish, but now that it had stopped, she found that she craved it, and that thought scared her.

Author's Note: Ah, I have readers! I'm not used to that. XD Thank you very much for the reviews that I've already got, and I hope you keep reading & reviewing. :

Thanksss.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Own next to nothing.

Author's Note: Every time there's a new review, I pretty much just die. It's great and I love them and thank you very much to all the people that are reading my story.

Chapter 4: Decisions

It had already been a week. Time was going by so fast and homework was piling up. Having to deal with the numerous essays and assignments on top of her Head Girl duties (meetings every Tuesday and Thursday, plus patrolling the halls every second night), Lily found herself stressed.

It was Saturday morning. The sun shone dimly today, behind layers of thick, fluffy, grey clouds, heavy with the threat of a storm. Most of the students were still fast asleep in their beds, warm and snug under their blankets. Most students, however, didn't include Lily. She sat at the desk in her common room, a thick grey sweater draped around her shoulders as she hunched over a pile of books.

_The 57 uses of serpents' blood in potions,_ she scrawled across the top of a long piece of parchment, and then stopped. _What were the uses of serpents' blood in potions?_ she asked herself. Another book was pulled towards her, but she left it closed. Her eyes burned with the lack of sleep and she leaned back in her chair, rubbing at them with her pale hands. _A few minutes to sleep before I do the rest of the work,_ she told herself, pushing the books away and folding her arms on the desk. Her head fell against them lightly and before she knew it, she was slowly drifting off to sleep.

--

Woken by the strong winds outside his window, James sat up slowly in his bed. He groped around the bedside table for his glasses and slipped them up his nose. The room suddenly came into view, and so did his clock. His jaw nearly dropped. Awake this early on a Saturday?!

But as he fell back onto his pillow, he soon realized that sleep wouldn't come back to him. Groaning, he rolled quietly out of bed, in case Lily was still asleep in the room next to his, and got to his feet. He dressed in jeans and a sweater and tiptoed out of his room. As he closed the door as silently as possible behind him and turned to head to the couch, he spotted Lily asleep at the desk. A crooked smile crept onto his face as he perched himself on the couch and watched her sleep.

He stayed like that for a while, admiring the way her red hair fell into her face and how her chest gently heaved with her heavy breaths, until all of a sudden, she lifted her head, eyes fluttering open. He watched her stretch her arms over her head and rub her eyes.

"Good morning." He said quietly, still grinning.

Lily jumped and turned around. "How long have you been sitting there?" she asked, then glanced at the clock on the wall.

"Not too long." He replied with a shrug "You look very peaceful when you sleep."  
Lily blushed and turned back to her homework, pulling her essay back towards her and opening her book.

"Homework on a Saturday?" he asked, getting to his feet and leaning over her shoulder.

Lily ignored the chills. "Some of us aren't _naturally_ gifted, Potter. Some of us actually have to work to succeed." She said, writing the first uses of serpents' blood on her essay.

"Guess we're not all lucky." James replied, laughing to himself as he turned to leave. "I'll see you later, alright Lily?"

"Alright, Potter." She said, waving her hand at him over her shoulder.

And with that, he left her to finish her homework. He wandered down to the Great Hall and ventured inside to find groups of students sitting together for breakfast. He found Claire sitting alone at the Gryffindor table, reading through her letter from home as she sipped from her pumpkin juice.

"Morning, sunshine." He said, kissing her on the cheek as he sat next to her.

Claire grinned at him, putting down her letter. "Hey! I haven't seen you all week. Where have you been?" she asked

James shrugged. "I've been busy with homework and Heads' meetings and stuff."  
"Been spending a lot of time with Lily Evans, then?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow.

This question surprised James. "I guess so, yeah. Why?" he asked, quirking his own eyebrows in return.

Claire shifted uncomfortably. "It was common knowledge that you kind of had a thing for her." She said quietly.

_She's jealous! _his mind shouted at him. "I guess you could say that." He replied "But I have you now. Evans is a thing of the past."

"Then why are you spending so much time with her?" Claire asked, eyebrows knitting together now.  
"We share a common room, Claire. We're Heads together. It's hard not to spend time with her." James explained.

Claire sighed, feeling foolish. "Sorry." She muttered "I guess I just thought that maybe you and her would..." she trailed off.

"Have a little faith in me. My thing for her is a thing of the past, a past that I do not intend to return to when I've got some one like you in the present." he assured her with a smile and Claire smiled back, convinced.

--

Finally, Lily had finished her essay and with a sigh she pushed it away with a smile. _One down,_ she thought to herself and she turned as she heard the portrait swing open.  
"Prongsie!" she heard some one call "Prongs, get up!"

"Not here." Lily shouted back. It was then that Sirius and Remus came into view.

"Blast." Sirius cursed, shaking his head. "He keeps disappearing." He then walked over and sat on the desk next to her homework. "Homework on a Saturday?" he asked, shuffling her papers.

Lily snatched them back. "James isn't here." She repeated.

"Yeah, got that the first time." Sirius grinned.

"So, why are you still here?" she asked with a sigh.

"We need some one to entertain us, Lily." Remus said, hopping onto the desk on Lily's other side.

Lily glanced up at them. "I thought the Marauders were good at entertaining themselves." She told them.

"Usually we are, but currently, we're the Marauders minus one. We wouldn't want to leave Prongsie out of our plans." Sirius said.

Distracted for a moment, Lily peered up again. "Why do you call him Prongs?" she asked.

Remus glanced at Sirius and laughed. "After his grandfather." He told her.

"Really?" Lily asked.

"No." Remus smiled.  
"Are you going to tell me?" Lily asked, closing her eyes for a moment.

"Nah." Sirius said, then he was struck with an idea. "We should check the Great Hall." He told Remus as he got to his feet.

"You go ahead, I'll catch up." Remus replied, nodding at him.

Sirius nodded back and rumpled Lily's hair before skipping off to the portrait.

Remus laughed as he watch Lily fix her hair again with a frown on her face.

"I don't know how you put up with them. They're terrible." Lily said.

"Nah, that's not true. They're great friends. Sometimes, it's just a little hard to keep 'em in line." Remus explained, picking up Lily's essay and scanning over it. "James and Sirius are very much the same person. They're loyal and trustworthy and…well, I guess you've got to hang around with them as much as I do to see it."

Lily nodded. "Guess you do." She said. "Looking at them, you'd never know it."

Remus nodded and put down Lily's essay.

"What happened to Potter over the summer?" Lily asked, watching him replace her homework.

Surprised, Remus stared at her. "What do you mean?"

"He's different. He's not so…Potter-esque anymore." She explained.

"People change, Lily." Remus shrugged. "I guess he just grew up a little."  
"Grew up a lot." Lily corrected him.

"Whatever you say, Lily." He smiled. "Look, I've got to go catch up to Sirius before he does something stupid. I'll see you later, and Lily…?" She looked up "Don't spend the day alone doing homework, okay?"

Smiling, Lily nodded and watched Remus walk out of the common room.

--

The sun had set and the sky was beginning to change to a darker blue. In tiny groups, stars began to pop out of nowhere, but their light was nothing compared to that of the half moon. Lily sat outside on a rock by the lake, hair blowing lightly in the wind. She could feel tiny drops of water starting to fall, but the rain didn't bother her.

"What are you doing out here?" A voice called from somewhere behind her.

Lily turned to see Victoria walking over to her, holding her cloak closely around herself.

"Sitting, what does it look like I'm doing?" Lily laughed, turning back to look at the water.

"But it's starting to rain!" Victoria whined, climbing up to sit next to Lily on the rock.

"Then what are _you_ doing out here?" Lily asked, still grinning.

"I came to find you. Anna and Louise are working on their Herbology project in the library. I hate the library." Victoria explained, making a face.

Lily smiled. "You hate the rain, too." She pointed out.

"I can't seem to catch a break." Victoria said, and Lily laughed. "A lot on your mind?" she added, shoving her with her shoulder lightly.

After a moment or so, Lily nodded. "How'd you know that?"

Victoria sighed. "For seven years now, you've come to sit on this same rock whenever you need to think about something. I've dubbed it Lily's Thinking Rock."

Smiling, Lily didn't answer.

"So, what's up?" Victoria nudged her again.

Lily groaned. "I don't know what's up, that's the problem." She said, hitting her head lightly on her uplifted knees.

"Well, let's see if I can help. Spill it, Lily Billy."

She took a deep breath. "What would you say if I told you that I might, and might is a very important word here, have feelings for…" She trailed off, mumbling.

"Come again?" Victoria asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"James Potter." Lily said, turning to face her.

It took Victoria a moment or two to react. "James Howard Potter? The same James Potter that you've hated for years and years and years? _The _James Potter?"

Lily made a face. "His middle name is Howard? How'd you know that?"

"My mom works with his mom. I heard his mother use it once when we went to their house for dinner." Victoria shrugged, and then an angry look appeared on her face. "But that is way off topic." She poked Lily's nose.

Lily sighed. "Yes, _the_ James Potter." She muttered, looking back out at the water.

"What brought this on?" Victoria asked.

"I don't know!" Lily exclaimed. "He's just so different. It's like he's completely grown up, he's completely changed. Everything that used to bug me about him is gone, and I guess that because of that, I can see him for who he really is and I like it and I don't want to." She looked up at Victoria and waited for her to say something, when she didn't she added "Say something."

She held up her hands in response. "Hold on a second, Lily, this is a lot to digest, okay?"

Lily nodded and watched as concentration crept onto her face, a look Victoria didn't use too often.

"I'm sorry, Lily, I don't see the problem. So you like James Potter, what's the big deal?" Victoria asked.

"_Might_ like him," Lily corrected before she continued "And there are several big deals, here. One, this is James Potter. Two, he has a girlfriend. Three, it's _James Potter_. And four, we decided to be friends and I don't want to ruin that by having feelings for him that aren't returned."  
"That's only three big deals. You said the same one twice." Victoria pointed out.

"Missing the point." Lily said.

"What makes you think the feelings aren't returned?"

Lily sighed. "Oh, I don't know, maybe it's the fact that he has a girlfriend." She said sardonically.

"But he liked you for so long. You don't know that those feelings just died." Victoria said.

"I know they did. I'm surprised he still wanted to be friends after I was so terrible to him. I would have though he'd hate me."

"You know he'd never hate you." Victoria said.

Lily didn't answer. They sat there in silence for a while, staring at the ripples in the water as the rain fell from the sky before Victoria spoke.

"What are you going to do?" she asked.

Lily shook her head. "Absolutely nothing. Like I said, I'm not going to ruin the friendship over nothing. I'll just put the feelings aside and go on with my life." She said, getting to her feet.

"Are you sure that's the best thing to do, Lily Billy?" Victoria asked, getting up with her.

"For now, it's the only thing to do." She grabbed Victoria's arm "Now, let's go inside. I'm practically soaked through."

They walked back to the castle, rain still falling on them in icy drops. The cold caused shivers to race down Lily spine and she shook her head to rid herself of them. If only everything was so easy to get rid of.

Author's Note: Chapter four, completed. Took me longer to write than the others did. Maybe that's just because I kept stopping to snack. Who knows. Do people really like Claire better than Lily? Damn, can't have that, now can I? She gets meaner in the later chapters, though, don't worry. Can't say anything else though. Wouldn't want to spoil it.

As always, thanks for reading and for the reviews that I've got and for the reviews I hope to get in the future.

-Cait.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing. This gets really annoying after a while.

Author's Note: I'm already at chapter five. Holy crow. I'm thinking that the whole fic is going to be about 18 chapters, but then I intend on writing a sequel. Hopefully people'll still be reading by then. Hugs and kisses.

Chapter 5: Jealousy

Sun poured into a dark green room through the curtains. Rays warmed the place and light brightened the darkness. James was asleep in the giant bed, snug under layers upon layers of sheets and blankets. He squinted as the sun burned his eyelids and turned his head away from the window. It was then that he saw her, lying peacefully next to him, her chest rising and falling slowly. He smiled and lifted a hand to brush her fiery hair away from her fair cheek. The smile grew when he saw her eyes flicker open and he was staring back into the deep emerald pools. Her full lips formed the words _good morning_, but no sound came out and then those lips were on his as she stretched to kiss him. He responded within the second, wrapping her arms around her tiny waist and drawing her closer to him so she was pressed up against his chest. The kiss grew more passionate until it became a mess of lips and tongues and James rolled the tiny woman underneath him. She pulled away but still stayed close. He could feel her breath against his face, warming his skin. And then her lips began to form a new set of words. _I love you,_ they said to him without making a sound.

And that was when James Potter awoke in his bed, sitting up and staring around a room that seemed so much more familiar with its scarlet and gold walls and Hogwarts paintings. It had only been a dream. But it had been a dream that scared him because he longed for it to be real.

Groaning and still breathing heavily, he slid his glasses up his nose and swung his legs over the side of the bed, bare feet against the cold hardwood floors. Sunday morning and as he glanced out his bedroom window, he could see the grey storm clouds still hovering from the sky. He got quietly to his feet and crossed the room to the bathroom where he showered and brushed his teeth before getting dressed for the day. Then he walked out of his room and gently shut the door behind him.

Once again, he spotted Lily asleep at the desk, her face pressed against a pile of open books. He shook his head and tiptoed over to her, gently shaking her shoulder. Her eyes popped open, and he found he had to look away, the memory of the dream still fresh in his mind.

"What time is it?" Lily rasped, scratching her head as she peered up at him.

"Nearly nine thirty. I thought you might want breakfast." James told her, smiling slightly.

Lily groaned and looked back at the books on her desk.

"Do you want me to bring something back up for you?" he asked, quirking a concerned eyebrow. "I could save you some toast of something for later."

She glanced up at him. "Could you?" she asked. "It would make it a lot easier if I could just eat it later."

James nodded, smiling at her. "Of course. I'll bring it up when I'm finished." He said.

"Thank you." She returned his smile and turned back to her studies.

James turned to leave, but stopped short. "Oh, Lily?" he asked.

She turned back around to look at him. "Yeah?"

"Should I still meet you in the library tonight?" he asked, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "You know, for the Herbology research…?"

It took Lily a second to remember. "Oh! Yeah, sure. I'll meet you there at seven o'clock. Is that okay?"

James nodded and waved with one hand before he left the common room.

Students were roaming the corridors of the school, some alone looking for a quiet walk, others with groups of friends, eager for something to so. James found his friends in the Great Hall, laughing at a dour looking Sirius.

"What's going on?" James asked, quirking an eyebrow as Sirius tried to mop something off the front of his jeans.

"Remember that sixth year Hufflepuff Padfoot was seeing?" Remus explained through chuckles. "Well, she found out about his fling with Emma Peters a few nights ago and…well…she wasn't all that happy about it." He gestured to the angry, mumbling teenager beside him. "She poured the pitcher of pumpkin juice on him."

"Bad luck, mate." James said, hiding his smile as he sat down.

He had just swung his legs over the bench when he felt cold hands covering his eyes.

"Guess who." A girl's voice said from somewhere over his head.

He recognized the skinny fingers and high voice and smiled, pulling the hands away from his eyes and holding on to them.

Claire sat down beside him and he kissed her lightly on the cheek.

"What are the plans for today?" she asked as James let go of her hands and began to pile pieces of toast onto his plate and onto his napkin.

"I intend on eating breakfast, but after that, there aren't really any plans." James shrugged.

"I thought we could spend the day in the Gryffindor common room." Claire said. Then she quirked her eyebrows at him. "What are you doing?" she asked, referring to the apple he was placing with the toast on the napkin.

"Oh, I'm taking the food upstairs for Lily to eat later. She's driving herself mental with all the homework she's been doing." He explained, now beginning to eat his own breakfast.

"Oh. Sorry to hear that." Claire said with a frown, but she didn't sound sorry at all.

James nodded.

"So," she continued "I was thinking that after dinner tonight, we could take a walk around the school, just us?"

James stopped eating and frowned. "I can't tonight." He told her, the words coming out quickly.

"Why not?" Claire mimicked his frown.

"I, uh…have homework to do in the library." He said.

"What homework?" she asked. It was obvious that that wasn't what she wanted to know.

"Herbology research." He mumbled.

"With Lily." She said, sighing.

James nodded meekly. "Maybe we can talk the walk earlier, though." He said.

"I don't know. I've…I've got some things to do. I'll come and find you later okay?" She pressed her lips to his and got to her feet, heading towards the doors and leaving the Great Hall.

"What's up with her?" Sirius asked, frowning.

"I think she's jealous." James said, watching her leave.

"Of course she is." Remus said. "You _have_ been spending a lot of time with Evans, you know."  
"Yes, I know." He replied and then he sighed.

"What is it?" Sirius asked, sensing there was something more.

"I'm…confused."

Remus and Sirius exchanged looks. "Confused about what?" they asked.

James sighed and went into an explanation about the dream he had had this morning. "…It felt so real…Like that was the way things are supposed to be. And I think that that might be the way I _want_ things to be."

"Are you saying that you still have feelings for Lily?" Remus asked.

James shrugged sadly. "I don't know." He sighed.

"Are you happy with Claire?" Sirius asked.

James nodded.

"Then I think that you're better off with her." Remus and James both gave him a look and Sirius rolled his eyes. "Look, when you pined for Evans, all she did was turn you did. All she did was make you miserable and you just said it yourself, that you're _happy_ with Claire."

James nodded, taking in everything he was saying. He knew he was happy with Claire, but sometimes he couldn't help but feel like he wanted something more.

"Since when you did become so good at giving relationship advice?" Remus asked, looking curiously over at Sirius.

Sirius just shrugged and grinned. "Maybe it comes from the lack of my own good relationships."

Remus shook his head and James smiled.

--

From where she sat on the couch in the Heads' common room later that day, munching on the toast that James had brought her, she heard the portrait swing open. She glanced up from the fire she had been staring at and saw Claire walking towards her.

Lily smiled slightly, only one side of her mouth lifting. "Hi." She said before adding, "James isn't here."  
Claire returned the smile sweetly and completely. "Oh, I know. I saw him in the Great Hall. I actually wanted to talk to you."

Lily was surprised and it showed in the way her eyes widened. "Oh. Sure, sit down." She finally said, recovering and patting the cushion beside her.

"No thanks. It won't take long." She said, still smiling too sweetly. "I actually just wanted to tell you to stay away from my boyfriend."  
"Oh." Lily said, not comprehending.

"He's spending all his time with you." Claire said, folding her arms and losing her smile. "I'm not stupid. I know what will happen if he's always with you and I'm not about to let it happen. I like the way things are between the two of us, and there's really no room for you in the picture, Lily." And suddenly, her smile was back.

"Right." Lily said, rolling her eyes and stifling a laugh. The whole thing was ridiculous!

"I mean it, Evans. Stay away from him."

Lily snorted. "How do you expect me to do that?" she asked. "We have classes together, we're partners in Herbology for the rest of the year, we're Heads' together and we share a dormitory for Merlin's sake!"

"I don't know how you're going to do it, and I don't _care_ how you do it, just _stay away from him_." Claire snapped before turning on her heel and walking towards the portrait again, leaving Lily laughing to herself on the couch.

"No need to be so pushy. Jeez." She heard Anna's voice from the portrait hole. She came into better view. "What's with her?" she asked.

"Really." Said Victoria from behind her. "If I wasn't such a nice person, I'd have kicked her in the mouth for being so rude."  
"She's mad at me." Lily smiled as Anna sat down next to her.

"For what?" Anna asked.

Victoria glanced at Lily, quirking her eyebrows.

"She claims that Potter is spending too much time with me." Lily shrugged. "She's jealous."  
"Of course she's jealous." Victoria said with a smirk, ruffling Lily's hair.

"What?"

"She knows that she's got no chance up against you." Victoria said like it was obvious, and she gave Lily a meaningful look.

Anna looked thoughtful for a moment before she nodded at Lily. "She's right." She said simply.

Victoria laughed at the look on Lily's face. "Come on, Ann." She said, pulling on her hair lightly. "Let's go find Lou. She'll be mad that we left her in the dormitory by herself."

Anna got to her feet. "We'll see you later, Lily."

"Bye, Lily Billy." Victoria winked at her before disappearing out of the common room.

--

Throughout the rest of the day, time flew by relatively quickly. James was now sitting in the Great Hall, laughing with Claire and the Marauders over dinner. The chatter echoed loudly through the hall, so they were leaned close together to hear each other.

Then, James glanced at his watch. "Damn." He swore under his breath. "It's nearly seven o'clock. I should head up to meet Lily."

He started to get to his feet when he felt Claire tug on his arm. "I forgot to tell you," she began "I ran into Lily earlier today. She asked me to tell you that she couldn't make it tonight and that you should re-schedule."

James looked surprised as he sat back down. "Oh, alright then." He said, shrugging as his friends gave him curious looks. He smiled at Claire, then.

"So, do you think we could take that walk now?" she grinned, eyes twinkling.

James nodded and got to his feet, holding his hand out for her to take which she did, and they set off together to wander grounds.

--

The minute hand on the clock slowly began to tick past eight o'clock. Lily watched it with a sigh, tapping her quill impatiently against the side of the table. Ms. Pince shot her a dirty look and she ceased right away, groaning as she looked down at the research she had done by herself.

He was either an hour late, or he wasn't coming. She couldn't understand why this bothered her so much. It wasn't as if she couldn't do the work without him, but the fact that he was nowhere to be seen irked her.

Looking down, she decided to make use of her time and continue the work on her own. That was what she told herself, but she was really giving him more time to show up with a good reason for being late

Another hour ticked by and Lily's parchment was filled with notes about the Tickle Lily and its growth patterns. Sighing and looking around the empty library, she got to her feet and gathered her things, giving up. She muttered a quick goodnight to the librarian and left the library, mind racing. She made her way through the corridors, back to the common room and muttered the password. She was thankful to be inside, with the warmth of the fire crackling and the rain on the window sounding oddly soothing.

Tossing her books onto the desk, she threw herself into the armchair by the fireplace and curled up in a ball, arms tightly wrapped around her knees.

_He _must_ have a good reason for being late,_ she told herself. But that was when she heard talking outside the portrait hole for a moment before it swung open and some one stumbled in. She turned around and saw James standing there with a smile. He waved when he saw Lily in the chair.

"Oh, hey Lily." He said, and suddenly it was obvious to Lily that he _didn't_ have a good reason at all. If he did, he'd have said sorry at least.

"Where have you been?" she snapped, getting to her feet. "I thought we were supposed to meet in the library at seven. I waited for two hours and you didn't show up!" she shouted angrily.  
"Lily, I—" James began, but Lily cut across him.

"I don't want to hear it, Potter. If you didn't want to come, then you just should have said so. Instead you left me sitting in the library by myself for _two hours_!"

"I'm sorry, but—" he tried again, but she was already stalking off towards her room and he jumped when he heard her door slam shut. He stared at her closed door, confused, and he walked over to it, gently rapping his knuckles against the wood.

"Lily, please come out of there." He said, pleading with her.

"Go away!" she shouted.

Giving up, he leaned against her door, banging his head lightly against it. He wasn't sure what exactly he had done, but when he heard what sounded like sobs coming from the other side, his heart sank just the same.

Author's Note: Aaand done. Poor Lily, getting stood up. And poor James for getting deceived. I told you that Claire would end up getting meaner as the story goes on. I think that if Claire existed in real life, I'd have kicked her in the shins.

As always, keep reading and reviewing because I love them a lot and thank you for the ones I already have.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Own next to nothing.

Author's Note: Whew. Chapter six. I'll clear something up for Dracolovers of Tomorrow, 'cause I can understand how it can be confusing. Claire and Lily are both in Gryffindor and both in their seventh year. They've never really spoken, I guess, just because they weren't close friends and there was never a need. And Claire has other friends, I just haven't introduced them. I'm not too sure if I will, and if I do, they'll probably just have teeny little parts. Hope that clears it up.

Chapter 6: Regret

"Oh, Lily, you look terrible." Victoria said to her as they met for Defence Against the Dark arts the following morning.

"What?" Lily asked, looking up. "What do you mean?"

Anna glanced at Louise and Victoria. "You look paler than you usually do. And your eyes are puffy and you look _really_ tired."

Lily shrugged, rubbing her eyes as if that would get rid of their puffiness. "Just tired."

"Up late with Potter last night, Lily Billy?" Victoria smiled, but her grin disappeared instantly at the sight of Lily's expression.

"He never showed." She mumbled, so quietly the girls strained to hear it. They filed into the classroom and took their usual seats next to each other.

"What do you mean he never showed?" Louise hissed as the professor walked up to the front of the class and began to call names from his list, taking attendance.

"I mean I sat in the library for two hours and he never showed up." Lily explained under her breath, lifting her hand sheepishly in the air as the professor called her name.

"I'll kick him." Victoria grumbled angrily, turning in her seat to glare at him where he sat in his seat at the back of the room.

"Don't bother." Lily shook her head.

"But –"

She was cut off by the teacher clearing his throat impatiently and mumbled a quick apology. Satisfied, he continued with the lesson.

Though she was writing down the notes she was supposed to, Lily wasn't paying attention. She heard his voice as if he were miles away, muffled with the distance. She was asleep with her eyes open, leaning forward on her desk with her arms folded. She barely heard him when he dismissed the class. If it hadn't been for Anna pulling lightly on her hand, she wouldn't have gotten up with the rest of the class.

"Come on, Lil." She muttered, linking her arm through Lily's as they walked.

Anna and Louise both looked concerned, practically carrying Lily to the classroom door.

"Victoria, are you coming?" Louise called, looking over her shoulder to see Victoria watching them.

"I'll catch up." She replied, nodding at them to go on without her.

Victoria followed them out the door, several paces behind them and instead of walking up the stairs with them, she turned right and headed towards the doors to the grounds, following some one else.

She watched as James and Remus sat on a bench against the wall and strolled over to them, hands in her pocket.

"Busy last night, Potter?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow at James as he peered up at her curiously.

"What?" he asked.

"What were you doing?" Victoria asked, folding her arms now. "Hard to believe that you _forgot_ to meet Lily in the library, so I want to know what kept you away."

James looked just as angry now. "What do you mean? Lily said that she was too busy to meet last night."

"No, she did not. She spent hours waiting for you and you never showed and I'm telling you, Potter, you better have a good excuse."

Remus stood up for him. "Claire told James that Lily couldn't make it. We were all there, we all heard it."

Victoria opened her mouth, but stopped for a moment, thinking. "Claire told you?" she asked, narrowing her eyes.

Remus nodded. James tried to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach as realization washed over his face.

Victoria gave a humourless laugh. "You believed _her_?" she hissed.  
"Of course I believed her. She's my girlfriend. I had no reason not to." James said defensively.

"No reason not to?" Victoria asked. "What about the fact that Austen threatened Lily to stay away from you? Isn't that a good reason not to believe her?"

"Claire threatened Lily?" James asked, getting to his feet.

"Yesterday afternoon." Victoria said. "Look, Potter. You better do something about this, or I'm going to, and I promise I won't be nice."

With that she walked away, leaving James and Remus standing together looking dumbfounded.

--

"Claire?" James called as he walked into the Gryffindor common room for the first time this year. Many other students looked up at the sound of his voice, in awe to see him in their common room.

He smiled at them and walked over to the stairs that led to the girls' dormitory. He heard footsteps and a small brown-eyed girl tripped down.

"Excuse me," he said to her with a smile. "Could you do me a favour?" The girl nodded, mouth hanging open. "Could you run on up there and find Claire Austen for me?"

Within seconds, the girl took off up the stairs again and came back down a few minutes later with Claire in tow.

"James!" she exclaimed, kissing him as she hopped over the last stair.

He gently pushed her away. "I need to talk to you." He said, grabbing her hand and pulling her out the portrait hole.  
"What's wrong?" Claire asked, a panicked looked on her face as they walked.

"Why did you tell me that Lily had cancelled yesterday?" James asked, quirking an eyebrow as he looked down at her.

Claire's lips for an 'o' shape and a blush crept onto her face. "I-I…"

"Tell the truth." James warned, hands on her shoulders.

Claire sighed and looked down at her feet. "I didn't want to do it, but I could help myself. I was just so…jealous at the time you two got to spend together." She told him, a false look of regret washing over her face.

James bought it and sighed. "I told you already, Claire, it's hard _not_ to spend time with her in the circumstances. I'm not about to avoid her just because you don't want me to see her."

"I understand." Claire said sadly. "Are you angry?"

After a moment, James shook his head. "No, I'm not angry. Just…just don't do it again, alright?"

"Promise." Claire said, smiling and bouncing on the balls of her feet as she drew a small x over her heart. She leaned up to kiss him lightly and James found he was smiling.

"Then you're forgiven."

Later that evening, James sat in the Heads' common room, impatiently twiddling his thumbs. He waited to Lily to come up from dinner, but it had already been an hour. He was beginning to wonder if she was sleeping with her friends to avoid him, but she walked through the portrait hole at that moment, bidding goodnight to Anna by the sound of it.

She caught sight of James on the couch, and headed straight for her room. He leapt to his feet, chasing after her.

"Lily, please wait."

Sighing, Lily turned around and looked him in the face, head tilted up slightly. "What, Potter?"

James scratched the back of his head nervously. "I want to explain what happened yesterday."

And he did. Once he'd finished, Lily simply stared up at him. "She…She told you I cancelled?" she asked, walking over to the couch and collapsing on it.

James followed her, nodding his head.

Lily shook her head. "I'm…I'm sorry, Potter. I thought you just…didn't want to come."

It was his turn to shake his head now as he sat next to her. "I thought you were to busy to go. I felt terrible when you I came in last night saying that you had waited for two hours."

Lily sighed again. "Maybe things would be better if I just stayed away from you."

James was quiet for a moment before her answered her. "But I don't want you to."

Lily peered up at him and felt her face grow hot, felt his face move closer to hers. She closed her eyes as she felt his breath on her cheeks, growing ever closer. She leaned up, lips parted slightly, breathing in his scent. And then she came to her senses.

Pulling away, her cheeks and neck burned and began to turn pink. "I-I'm sorry." She muttered, disappearing inside her room.  
James watched her leave and leaned back on the couch. What had he done?

After a few moments, James got to his feet and left the common room, wandering the corridors until he was back at the Gryffindor common room. He clambered inside and quickly raced up the stairs to the boys' dormitory. He found Sirius asleep in a bed across from Peter and in front of Remus and he shook him lightly by the shoulder.

He jumped up, gasping before he realized who it was. "Prongs?" he asked, squinted at his friend through the dark. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I need help." He whispered, sitting on the end of his bed.

"What?" Sirius grumbled groggily.

"I tried to kiss Lily."

Sirius was awake now. "What?!" he yelped before James covered his mouth and punched him in the arm. Sirius rubbed his shoulder, glaring at him. "What do you mean you tried to kiss Lily?" he asked quietly.

"I mean I tried to kiss her." James repeated, looking at his best friend as though he was an idiot.

"How far did you get?" Sirius asked.

"Far enough. It'd have happened if she hadn't jumped up and left." James groaned, head in his hands.

"And you're upset because you feel like you're betraying Claire?" Sirius asked.

James nodded, but he felt as if there was more to it.

"Well, you didn't do anything, so it's not betrayal." Sirius shrugged.

James nodded. "You're right." He said. "I…I just have to make sure it doesn't happen again."

But as he wandered back to his own dormitory, leaving Sirius to slowly fall back to sleep, he doubted his own words. Something deep inside of him _wanted_ it to happen again. _No,_ he told himself firmly, _it can't happen again. Ever._

It was on that note that he drifted off to sleep, tossing and rolling around in his bed, dreaming dreams that felt more like nightmares.

--

Sleep, once again, was refusing to come to Lily. She had given up on her bed for the night. With her window thrown open, she sat cross-legged on the sill, feeling the cool wind on her skin. Her hair whipped around her cheeks, but she hardly felt it. Things were becoming so confusing that she couldn't stand it. She was trying, but the odds seemed to be stacked against her.

Any feelings she had for James Potter would be ignored. They would be friends, and friends alone and that was _enough._ She came to a conclusion as she sat there in the cold air. She made her decision and she would stick to it, for her benefit and for his.

Author's Note: This chapter's short and it's not my best. I have a feeling that I might tweak it eventually, but for now, I'm going to leave it like this. I hope it's still worth reading and I promise my next chapters will be better.

As always, thank you for reading and for reviewing and for the reviews that I hope to keep getting.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: I have 37 reviews so far. I'm pretty excited. Thank you very much for all of them. So, I guess the last chapter wasn't as bad as I thought it was? Maybe I'll leave it alone there. I'll see. Here's chapter seven. I decided that I was going to skip forward a few months, for the sake of the story plot. I aim to please, hope you like it.

Chapter 7: Invitations

"Lily Billy!" Anna called from somewhere outside Lily's door.

A groggy Lily answered the call, pulling the door open and squinting as the December sunlight poured in through the large window of the Heads' common room.

"What do you want Anna?" Lily asked, stifling a yawn with her hand.

"It's Saturday." She replied, beaming at her.

"All the more reason for you to let me sleep." Lily pointed out.

"But we're going to Hogsmeade today!"

Lily groaned. She had completely forgotten about the Hogsmeade trip this afternoon.

"You forgot, didn't you?" Anna asked, folding her arms.

Lily nodded and retreated back into her bedroom, leaving the door open, however, for Anna to follow her. She began rummaging through her trunk trying to find clothes.

"We need to buy Christmas presents and supplies for your party next week." Anna said, sitting on Lily's bed.

Lily straightened up holding a pair of jeans and a green sweater. "I forgot about the party." She mumbled. She had decided to hold a small Christmas party this year, but with all the work she'd been doing, it seemed to have slipped her mind completely.

"Don't worry, Lil." Anna said, waving a hand as Lily slipped into the bathroom with the door left open a crack so she could still hear. "We didn't forget. Lou and I made a list of things we need and Vicky made a list of people we should invite."

As Lily slipped into the shower, the steaming water pounding soothingly against her skin, she felt very grateful to her friends. Even though Lily's time with them was limited to a few hours a night, they were still very close.

After she was groomed and dressed, she stepped out to find Anna still sitting on her bed.

"You waited?" Lily asked, quirking an eyebrow as she slipped her feet into her sneakers.

"You take a crazy long time in the shower." Anna said in response.

Lily laughed. "Sorry." She said, watching Anna get to her feet and join arms with hers.

Anna shook her head. "Come on, slowpoke. Vick and Louise are in the Great Hall waiting for us."

The Great Hall was filled with chattering students, eating breakfast and discussing their plans for the afternoon away from school. Lily found Louise and Victoria sitting at the far end of the table, leaning close together so they could hear each other over the rest of the noise. They looked up as she and Anna approached.  
"Morning." Lily said, sitting down.

"About time you showed up. We thought we'd have to buy our own Christmas presents." Victoria said, smiling in reply.

"Would've made it a lot easier for me." Lily shrugged, pouring herself a glass of juice.

"You're not getting off that easy." Louise told her,

Lily grinned. "Anna tells me you have lists for my Christmas party."

Victoria shook her head. "Nuh-uh." She said. "It's _our_ Christmas party now, Lily Billy. It's just at _your_ house."

Half sighing, half laughing, Lily nodded. "I guess that's fair." She said.

Turning her head, she watched people getting to their feet to join their Heads of Houses so they could get on their way to Hogsmeade.

"Come on." Lily said, standing up. "You can show me the lists for _our_ party on the way there." She grinned.

--

"It's snowing." Sirius said, holding out mitten clad hands to catch snowflakes in his palms.

"Well spotted, Padfoot." Remus said, rolling his eyes.

"Thank you." Came his reply.

James laughed.

The three of them strolled down the main street of Hogsmeade, turning this way and that to get through the crowds of students.

"Where to?" James asked, dodging a tiny wizard, littler than Professor Flitwick, as he hurried past with a green owl on his shoulder.

"Broomsticks?" Sirius suggested.  
"It'll be crowded." Remus pointed out, but then he shrugged. "But I don't feel like walking too far, so we may as well."

They turned into the Three Broomsticks and found an empty table at the back of the room.

The waitress was on their heels. The three boys had barely sat down when Mme Rosmerta appeared at the side of the table, grinning down at them.

"Afternoon, boys." She said. "What can I do you ya?"

Sirius smiled. "Three butterbeers, please, Rosmerta."

Grin never fading, she turned on her heel and disappeared behind the bar.

"What time are you meeting Claire today, Prongs?" Sirius asked as she returned within the minute with their drinks.

"At one o'clock." He replied, taking a swing of the warm brew in front of him.

"He's leaving us, again." Sirius said sadly, though he was grinning as he turned to Remus.

Remus sighed in the same sad tone. "I know. That's every weekend this month. We're growing apart, Jamesie." He added.

James laughed. "Oh, you'll live." He said.

"And what time are you meeting Evans tomorrow?" Sirius asked.

"Six o'clock." He replied. They met every Sunday in the library to finish homework and other things. James enjoyed the time he got to spend with her, especially now that they had become friends for real this time.

"You really _are_ leaving us!" Remus said, sounding offended, but he was still laughing.

"We really _are_ growing apart!" Sirius added, tears coming to his eyes from laughter.

James just rolled his eyes.

--

"You want to invite Ruban Swan?" Lily asked, choking on her butterbeer as she, Victoria, Louise and Anna sat in the Three Broomsticks near the door.

Louise laughed. "What's wrong with him?"

Lily's eyes were watering from laughing as she replied. "What isn't wrong with him?"

Anna nodded. "He talks to himself."  
"And he sleeps with a stuffed pumpkin." Lily added.  
"He smells like pickles and oranges."

"And he thinks my name is Laura."

Louise made a face. "He does smell like pickles and oranges, doesn't he?"

Victoria laughed. "Okay, he's off the list." She said, crossing him off with a quill from her purse. "Anyone else on here that we don't approve of?" she added.

Lily shook her head. "Everyone else seems fine." She said shrugging, pulling the list closer to her to read over it one more time.

"I'll invite Linda, Harriet and Josephine from Hufflepuff tomorrow morning." Anna said, reading over Lily's arm.

"I'll invite Susan and Greg from Ravenclaw, and Henry and Elizabeth." Louise said, thinking.

"Lil, will you make sure to invite the Marauders?" Victoria asked.

Lily nodded, folding the list. "I'll ask James tomorrow night." She said. "Let's go over the supplies list…"

"Butterbeer?"

Lily checked the bag and, sure enough, heard the bottles clanging together. "Check."

"Ribbons and streamers?"

"Check."

"Christmas music?"

"Check."

Anna sighed. "We just need to go to Honeydukes and then we're done."

"Let's go, then." Lily said, downing the last of her drink in one gulp before getting to her feet, gathering all the bags together.

With that, they left the Three Broomsticks and set off down the street to find the sweets shop.

--

The hands on the clock read six o'clock as Lily sat in the library the next night. Her legs were pulled up onto her chair and folded under her. She had a book open on the table, her schoolbag with her books and homework was on the floor beside her feet.

"Hey, Lil." Said a voice.

Lily looked up to see James lowering himself into the seat across from her, schoolbag slung over one shoulder.

"Hi." She replied with a smile, closing her book.

"How've you been?" he asked, pulling books and scrap parchment out of his bag.  
"Well, thanks. You?"

"Same." He grinned. "So, what are we working on tonight?"

Lily shrugged and gathered her own books and papers on the table in front of her. "What haven't you finished?"

James laughed. "Other than everything?" he asked.

Lily sighed, but she was grinning. "Then what do you want to finish first?"

"The potions essay." He said, making a face as he searched through the mess of papers in front of him. "That's due first."

Lily pulled hers out and handed it to him. He took it from her, staring at her neat, cramped writing. He read through it once to find out what the uses of moonstone really were in potion making, and then he handed it back to her and began to write his own.

Lily took it back and watched him write, occasionally pointing out where he had made a mistake and then she would watch him make a face and scratch it out.

"There." He said after a while, holding his essay away from him and smiling at it.

"Took you long enough." Lily smiled as he put it away. "What else do you have due tomorrow?" she asked.

James thought for a moment. "Just a paper on Animagi." He said with a shrug. "And I can finish that in two minutes."

"Two minutes? You have to do research and stuff, though." She said.

James just grinned and pulled out another blank piece of parchment. His hand began to fly across the page as he wrote about the transformation from human to animal. Within minutes, as he predicted, he was finished.

He handed the essay to Lily with a smile on his face. She read over it and stared at him.

"How did you do that?" she asked "Without looking anything up or reading anything?"

James shrugged. "It's an easy subject for me." Then, seeing the shocked look that was still on Lily's face, added, "I've researched it before."

"Why?" Lily asked.

He shrugged again. "I felt like it." He had researched it before, and he knew of the transformation _very_ well. It was hard not to when you experienced it every so often, but that wasn't something that he could explain to Lily.

Lily nodded.

"So, should I bother to ask whether you've finished everything?" James asked, smiling again.

Lily smiled back. "Everything's done." She said.

"Of course it is." James said. "You know, it'd be nice if you fell behind just once and gave _me_ the chance to help_ you_ finish your homework for a change."

Lily laughed. "Alright. After Christmas break, I will. Promise." She said, then was struck with a memory. "Oh, I nearly forgot. I meant to invite you to a Christmas party that we, uh… Anna, Lou, Victoria and I, are throwing."

"Christmas party?" James quirked an eyebrow.

Lily nodded. "You and Sirius and Remus and Peter, if he wants to, are all invited." She said, then added reluctantly "And you can invite _her_ if you want to."

James grimaced. "When is it?" he asked, changing the subject slightly.

"Christmas Eve." She replied and was pleased to see him smile.

"I'll be there…uh…but, _where_ will I be?" he asked.

"Oh, right…" she scribbled an address down on a piece of parchment and handed it to him. "My house."

James nodded, reading over it. "Then I'll be there, and so will Sirius and Remus for sure. I'll ask…the other two tomorrow." He grinned.

Lily nodded.

Together, they rose from their chairs and gathered their things, heading out of the library and walking through the corridors back to the Heads' common room. They mumbled the password and stumbled inside. James watched Lily throw her things onto the desk by the window, piling the books and papers in order for her classes tomorrow morning. He smiled and turned to head to his bedroom, but he stopped in front of the door glancing back over his shoulder.

"G'night, Lily." He grinned.

She looked up from her school things and glanced over at him, hair hanging into her face. She smiled. "Night, James." She replied before turning back to her work. He disappeared behind his bedroom door.

Lily sighed once her things were organized properly and walked over to her bedroom, pulling the door open and closing it behind her quietly. Quickly changing into pyjama pants and an old sweater, she climbed into her bed and nestled herself under the blankets. From where she lay, she could see snow still falling gently from the clouds. For the first time since she'd been back at Hogwarts, sleep washed over her easily, but even that couldn't wipe the smile off her face.

Author's Note: Yayy, Lily's happy. She and James are friends. Things are going good. For now. Hahaa. I hope you liked the chapter and I promise to update soon.

As always, thanks for reading and for the reviews that I've already got. And thanks for the reviews that I'm going to get…Wink, wink.

With love, Cait.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Own next to nothing.

Author's Note: Tomorrow is the last day of my five day weekend. Sad. But I get to write more during the week, so that might make some other people happy. Here's chapter eight, my lovelies.

Chapter 8: What if.

The next morning, Lily was awoken by a loud rapping at her door. Jumping out of her bed, she trudged across the carpeted floors and pulled the door open. She then came face to face with an anxious looking James Potter.

"What are you doing?" she groaned.

"You're going to be late. We have Potions first." He told her, pushing her back into her room so that she would get ready.

Lily slowly slumped over to the bathroom until his words finally sunk in. "Holy crow! I'm going to be late!" she yelped, quickly brushing her teeth and hopping into her school robes. She didn't bother to brush her hair and she slipped her shoes on without first putting on a pair of socks.

"How late am I?" she yelled to James.

"We've got maybe… five minutes to get to the dungeons." He said, gathering her books from the table and handing them to her as she clambered out of her room on one foot, still struggling to slide her other shoe on.

He quickly followed her out the common room and laughed to see the disgruntled look on her face.

"What's so funny?" she asked, as she hurried through the corridor.

"Just the look on your face." He said.

Rolling her eyes, Lily ignored him and made to turn down another hallway, but he had grabbed her arm.

"This way." He said, pulling her in the opposite direction. "I know a shortcut."

"A shortcut?"

She watched as he searched among the portraits and stopped in front of a large one of a giraffe and a slim woman in a green dress.

"Crescent blossom." He whispered, and the portrait swung forward on its hinges, revealing a dark and eerie looking tunnel.

Lily peered down it. "You want me to crawl through there?" she asked, staring up at him.

"Do you want to be late?" he asked in reply and laughed as she hopped through before him.

Light was completely shut off from the tunnel as the painting swung back against the wall.

"Lumos." James muttered, holding his wand aloft.

The stone walls were cold against Lily's hands as she used them to balance herself so she wouldn't trip, hurrying across the uneven stones. It seemed like they had been walking for a few minutes and finally, they came to what appeared to be the back of another portrait. James leaned over Lily and pushed on it so it swung forward and he let Lily clamber out before him. They found themselves in a small corridor to the left of the potions classroom and they dashed in with another group of students so that no one would notice them. As they walked, Lily glanced over her shoulder and smiled at James in thanks. They had gotten there, even before the Potions master had, in plenty of time.

Lily quickly positioned herself behind her cauldron where Louise was already standing.

"Jeez, Lily Billy." She muttered as their teacher swept past them to the front of the class. "Cutting it kind of close, don't you think?"

Lily grinned in spite of herself. "Maybe a little."

The professor scribbled down the instructions on the board and hastily told them to get to work. Lily and Louise began immediately.

"We need a pinch of lacewing flies." Lily instructed and Louise handed them to her. Lily dumped them intro her cauldron and stirred twice in opposite directions. She then peered up at the blackboard again and grimaced. "You can cut the flobberworms."

Louise laughed and sighed at the same time. "I _always_ cut the flobberworms." She grinned, taking the flat knife from her bag and beginning to poke at the wriggling worms on their table.

Lily shuddered.

--

"This is so gross." Sirius said, pressing against a flobberworm with the side of his knife.

"Padfoot, you're supposed to cut them, not squish them." James said, making a face.

Sirius shook his head. "It's gross either way."

"You need to cut five of them."

"Can't we just use three?" Sirius whined, pointing to the worms he'd already chopped.

"Can you read, mate?" James asked.

"Of course." He replied.

"How many does it say we need to use?"

Sirius squinted to see the board through the fumes that were filling the classroom. "Five."

"Then we can't use three."

Sirius sighed. "Fine." He groaned, pulling another wiggling worm toward him. "But you're doing it next time."

James snickered. "Fine with me."

Sirius finished cutting the flobberworms and dumped them into the cauldron. Their potion turned a sickly green colour.

"Is it supposed to be that colour?" Sirius asked, peering down at it.

James shook his head. "I have no idea." He said, then he nudged Sirius. "Go ask Moony."

"I asked him last time." Sirius objected.

"No you didn't." James laughed. "_I_ asked him last time because _you_ said that _you_ had asked him the time before."

Sirius thought back. "Fi – wait, what?" he said, looking confused.

"Just go ask him."

In a minute or so, Sirius returned. "Moony's potion is green too. It's the same colour, but it looks ten times better than ours does." He pouted.

James grinned. "His potion _always_ looks better than ours does. Add the milkweed." He said, pointing to the tiny vial filled with a thick white liquid.

Sirius obeyed and dumped the contents into the cauldron, which began to smoke instantly, but only for a few seconds. James peered inside, leaning low over the side of the cauldron. It had turned pink and was now sparkling. He straightened up and looked over at Sirius.

"Is it supposed to be doing that?" he asked.

Sirius sighed. "Moony!" he shouted across the room.

--

"My hands _still_ smell like flobberworms." Louise hissed to Lily as they sat through History of Magic, their last class of the day.

"Not my problem." Lily whispered back as Professor Binns floated past them.

"It's going to be your problem. Next time you can cut them." Louise sighed, sniffing her hands one last time and making a face.

Lily snorted.

"Professor!" she heard a high-pitched voice call out from directly behind her. "Can you please ask Lily to stop talking? I find it very distracting."

Lily turned in her seat and narrowed her eyes at a jubilant looking Claire.

"Miss Evans, please be quiet. If I have to tell you again it will be a detention." Professor Binns said quickly, throwing a dirty look at Lily before he continued with his lesson.

Lily looked appalled and she turned to glare at Claire again, who was still smiling. She turned back in her seat and glanced at Louise who rolled her eyes. Lily looked to the teacher who was now gliding through desks and willed herself to pay attention. That was when she heard quiet laughter from behind her, following by the distinct sound of whispering. It wasn't loud enough for her to hear, but the sound was still very disruptive. The giggles began again, and this time, Lily turned around.

"Shut up." She hissed at Claire and another blond girl that she recognized to be Stephanie Andrews.

"Miss Evans!" she heard from in front of her and she quickly turned around. Professor Binns was glaring down at her. "I've already asked you to be quiet today. Detention tonight."

Lily's mouth hung open as he glided away, resuming his speech as though nothing at happened.

Soon after, they class was dismissed and Lily and Louise met up with Victoria and Anna.

"Can you believe that?" Lily asked as they walked up to their common rooms to drop of their books before heading down to dinner. "It took everything in me not to turn around and punch her lights out."

"Temper, temper, Evans. Might want to learn how to control it…" a sneer voice said from behind them as Stephanie slid by them.

Lily watched her go with her eyes narrowed.

"Ignore them, Lil. They're _trying_ to get you into trouble." Anna said, acting as the voice of reason.

"And it's working." Lily muttered through clenched teeth. She bade goodbye for the moment to her friends as she continued to the Heads' Common room. She was still fuming by the time she walked through the portrait hole, so angry that she didn't see James standing there until she was on her way out.

"Oh, holy crow, James!" she said, jumping at the sight of him. "When did you get there?"

James laughed. "I've been here the whole time, Lily." He said. "You must be pretty distracted."  
Lily shook her head. "No, I must be pretty angry." She corrected him.

She stepped out of the portrait hole and James followed her.

"At?" James asked and Lily threw him a look. "Oh, right."

"I don't understand it. How do you put up with her? She's terrible!" Lily fumed.

"She's not that bad, Lily." He tried to reason with her.

"She is, James!" Lily argued. "She really is! She's the devil himself…herself."

James sighed. "Do you want me to uninvite her to your party on Christmas Eve?" he asked.

Lily shook her head. "She won't let you come otherwise." She pointed out.  
James nodded. "I'll try and keep her in line, okay, Lil?" he asked.

Lily nodded. "Please and thank you." She said to him as they arrived at the Great Hall. She smiled at him as they went their separate ways and as she walked past his friends, she could feel the heat of Claire's glare on her back.

"You know," Victoria said as Lily sat down across from her. "If she _does_ end up coming to the party next week, I could, you know, _accidentally_ slip something into her butterbeer."

"Thanks, but no thanks." Lily said with a smile and she began to pile dinner onto her plate.

--

"What's your favourite colour?" James asked of Lily as they sat in the common room that night near the fireplace, after Lily had returned from her detention.

Lily thought for a minute. "I like purple." She replied. "What's yours?"

"Green." He replied with a grin. Staring up at her eyes, it was hard to pick any other colour, but he quickly forced that thought out of his mind and continued with his questions. "What's your favourite book?"

"Alice in Wonderland." Lily replied, and added, "A muggle book." when James looked confused.

"Do you have a favourite stone?" he asked. "Like a diamond or something?"

"Black Opal." She answered. "What's your favourite food?"

"My mom's chocolate cake. It's the best cake out there, ask Sirius." James laughed.

"Sirius spends a lot of time at your house?" Lily asked curiously.

"He lives there during the summer." James replied.

"Why?"

James shrugged. "We'll just say…that he doesn't get along with his family."  
Lily nodded, understanding his desire to close the subject. She opened her mouth to ask another question when there came a rapping against the portrait.

James got to his feet and crossed the room to answer it. Lily glanced over and saw him chatting quietly with Peter. She saw James nod, and he must have said something because she saw Peter answer him. Then the portrait swung closed again and Peter was gone.

"What was all that about?" Lily asked as James joined her again.

"He just wanted to remind me about something." He said and then he smiled suddenly. "Do you know how to play 'what if'?" James asked.

Lily thought for a moment. "Is that when you ask crazy questions about what could happen and what you'd do if it happened?"

James nodded.

"My grandmother used to play that with my sister." Lily smiled.

James smiled back. "What if everyone in the world died of a mysterious illness except us?" he asked.

Lily thought. "I'd probably cry." She said, smiling. "I mean, look at the company I'd have."

"Hey!" James said, mocking offence.

"Wouldn't you be upset to be stuck with me?" Lily asked through her laughter.

"Naw, probably not." James shrugged, beaming. "At least I'd have something nice to look at, right?"

Lily laughed and swatted his arm. "It's late." She said suddenly, having seen the time indicated by the clock on the wall. "I should get to bed. I doubt you have a secret passage to get to _every_ class, I can't be late again."

"You'd be surprised." James said, smiling. "Good night, Lily Billy."

"Good night, James." And she disappeared behind her bedroom door.

Author's Note: I updated two chapters in one day. Look at me go. I hope you like it, and as always, thanks for reading.

With love, Cait.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing. Man, I hate these things.

Author's Note: 'Ullo again. Already chapter nine. Fun times. So, to clear stuff up from the last chapter. Ahem; why were they asking each other questions? I don't really know. I kind of just threw it in there for fun. There really was no reason, just a conversation. And…I think that was all I needed to clear up, right? Correct me if I'm wrong, and enjoy chapter nine my loves.

Chapter 9: Christmas Break

The week had flown by in a flurry of mass assignments and snow storms. Teachers seemed to feel the need to dish out as many essays and other nonsense for the holidays, but everyone knew that they wouldn't get done. Everyone, of course, except Lily, who was hurrying to finish it all before the students left the next morning.

"You're going to work yourself to death, Lily Billy." Louise said, an appalled look on her face as she stared down at the redhead.

The two of them, along with Victoria and Anna sat in the Heads' common room. Lily poured over her homework while the other three watched her in awe.

"Lou's right, Lil." Victoria said, popping her bubblegum bubble loudly. "It's practically Christmas! It's a well known, unwritten law that no student should be working this hard before Christmas."

Lily merely grunted.

"Come off it, Lily. It's Friday night. Take a little break with us. Come play in the snow." Anna pleaded.

Lily looked up. "I can't!" she argued "Look at this," she gestured grandly to the stack of books in front of her. "I've all this to do!"

"Yes, but it's only due a week after we come back. Just give it a rest for now." Anna said.

Sighing, Lily looked between her friends. "Oh, alright." She said, smiling and caving in to their requests. "But only for tonight."

Victoria squealed. "I knew you'd crack." She said, beaming. "Now run along and fetch your coat. We've a snow war to start."

Lily rose from her seat and dashed in and out of her room, a long black cloak slung over her arm. The girls made a quick stop at the Gryffindor tower so the rest of them could gather their things before they set off toward the grounds.

"I love the snow." Anna said, twirling in a small circle as soon as they stepped outside.

"It's frightfully cold." Louise said.

"Suck it up, Lou." Lily laughed. "You dragged me out here, you can deal with it for an hour."

Louise opened her mouth to reply, but no words came in. Instead, she uttered a soft scream as a handful of snow collided with the side of her face. She turned, wiping the icy white slush off her cheek, and glared at a giggling Victoria.

"Come on, Louise." She said through her laughter. "Lighten up."

Possessed with a new energy, Louise bent down and gathered a handful of snow. She patted it together before hurling it at Victoria. Luckily, for Victoria anyway, she ducked and the snow was met with Lily's arm.

"Hey!" Lily shouted with a smile, gathering her own snowball and chasing after her friends.

An hour or so later, the four girls stumbled into the Heads' common room, sopping wet and giggling like lunatics.

"What have you been up to?" said a sickly sweet voice when they entered the common room.

Lily looked up, though she didn't really need to. She spotted Claire across the room, nestled in James' lap. They were not alone. Remus, Peter and Sirius were also gathered near the fireplace, each nursing a butterbeer in their hands. Claire sneered at Lily with her eyes narrowed.

"Nothing of interest." Victoria snapped before Lily could even open her mouth to reply.

Looking unperturbed, Claire shrugged and turned away.

"Care to join us?" Remus asked.

Even though Claire wasn't facing them, Lily could tell by the way she moved her head that she had shot him a dirty look.

"I don't know—"

"Sure, come sit, ladies." Sirius said, gathering four more butterbeers from under the table. As the girls sat down, he handed the bottles off to them.

"Cheers." Victoria said, unscrewing the cap of hers, slipping it into her pocket and taking a sip.

Peter eyed her curiously.

"Victoria collects bottle caps." Anna explained on her behalf.

"Weird." Sirius muttered, casting Victoria a strange look.

James laughed. "Says the one that collects rocks that look like famous wizards."

"They could be worth something someday!" Sirius protested.

Lily snorted.

"Ah, yeah, Evans?" Sirius said, turning to look at her. "What strange, secret things do you collect?"

Lily shrugged. "Nothing." She said.

"There must be something." Remus prodded.

Lily shook her head. "Nope, there's nothing. I don't collect anything."

Claire opened her mouth to say something but James gave her a look and she rolled her eyes. "Oh, come off it Evans, there's got to be something wrong with you?" she said, her voice sounding fake, but no one else caught it.

"I'm sure there is, but it has nothing to do with me collecting anything." Lily shrugged. "Or maybe it's the fact that I don't collect anything."

Again, Claire opened her mouth, but she shut it after a second as if she thought better of what she was going to say.

"I vote for a change of subject." Sirius said. "What else is there to talk about?"

"Who else is going to your party, Lily?" Remus asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"_Our_ party." Anna corrected.

"We did the planning." Victoria said, grinning at Lily.

"Okay," Remus said, giving them a strange look. "Who else is invited to your party, _girls?_"

"So you _are_ coming, then? I wasn't sure." Lily said, looking between them.

"You knew I was." James said. "And I passed on the word." He added, nodding to the rest of them.

Sirius and Remus both nodded. Lily glanced at Peter.

"I need to clear it with my mum, but I can't see why not." He said with a shrug.

"And Claire said she'd be happy to come." James added.

Claire smiled, showing all her teeth. "Thrilled." She muttered.

Lily forced a smile. "There aren't too many others. Harriet and Josephine are coming, you can't invite one without the other. Greg said he'd be there, but a bit after everyone else. He has to help his mum decorate the house first."

"I asked Susan and Elizabeth this morning. They said they'd come." Louise added.

"And aside from them, there were about ten other people." Victoria added.

"Fifteen including you." Lily added.

Remus glanced at his watch. "It's late." He said "We should get going. I still need to pack."

"You haven't packed yet?" Lily asked.

Peter grinned. "Marauder tradition. We never pack before the last minute."

"And even then, Moony does most of our packing. The rest of us never really get around to it." James said.

Remus grinned and rolled his eyes, getting to his feet. "Another Marauder tradition." He laughed. He, Sirius and Peter headed for the portrait hole.

"I'll walk Claire back." James said. He gently pushed Claire off his lap and got up after her.

"G'night, Lily. Victoria, Anna, Louise…" Claire muttered, turning away.

As she and James made to follow the rest of them, Lily distinctly heard James whisper, "Now, was that so hard?"

Lily stifled a yawn with her hand, turning back to her friends.

"Have you packed?" she asked the three of them.

Victoria half shrugged. "I packed what I needed."

"And we packed the rest." Anna said, and she and Louise laughed.

Lily grinned. "What say you to a slumber party, then?"

"I say, you're on." Louise beamed. She waved her wand and three squishy pillows appeared atop a mountain of fuzzy blankets.  
"You go on ahead, set everything up in my room. I'm just going to clean up a bit." Lily said.

Victoria hopped to her feet, carrying bundles of cloth in her arms and they all raced into Lily's bedroom.

Lily waved her wand and watched as the mess of scattered butterbeer bottles vanished. She adjusted the mess of her homework on the desk and turned to join the other girls when she heard the portrait open and close. James came back in, stifling a yawn and rumpling his hair.

"That was quick." Lily said.

He started slightly, obviously not having seen her standing there. "It's not far." He said. "Plus, we took a shortcut."

Lily smiled. "Another shortcut, huh?"

Smiling James glanced around. "You didn't need to clean everything up. It was mostly our mess." He said.

"It wasn't a problem." Lily shrugged. "Took two seconds."

James nodded slowly. "Girls gone?" he asked.

Lily shook her head. "No, we're having a bit of a slumber party." She smiled.

He pretended to look shocked, holding a hand to his hand. "And I wasn't invited?" he said. "I'm shocked." Then he abandoned his act and laughed. "Just don't be too loud, or I'll have to report you." He added, this time with feigned authority.

Lily snorted. "You wouldn't dare."

"You're right," James grinned. "I wouldn't. Goodnight, Lily. Have fun."

"Goodnight, James."

--

"That was a terrible idea." Victoria groaned as they boarded the train the next morning.

"We stayed up _way_ too late." Lily agreed. She excused herself quietly as she pushed gently through the crowds to find a compartment.

"And we got up _way_ too early." Anna added. She glanced through one of the glass doors and pulled it open saying, "This one's empty."  
The girls clambered inside and shut the door behind them.

"I'm going to nap the whole way home." Louise said, throwing herself into a seat by the window and curling up in a ball, head against the wall.

"I'm all for that idea."

The Hogwarts Express route was always scenic, but James had never noticed before. He stared out the window in his compartment, watching as they rolled past rivers and forests that gleamed in the December sunlight.

"I win." Peter said, looking up from his chess game.

Sirius, who sat across from him, stared down at his pieces. "Why do I _always _lose?"

"You don't have the brain power to win at chess, Sirius." Remus pointed out from somewhere behind his book.

"You'll see, one day I'll—" but he stopped mid-sentence, head tilted towards the door.

James had pried his stare away from the window, and was now staring intently at the odd look on his friend's face.

"Food trolley." Remus said in reply to James' inquisitive look, he himself looking away from his book to stare at Sirius.

Sure enough, Sirius got to his feet and dashed out of the compartment.

Peter laughed as he got to his feet as well. "I fancy a snack." He said. "Want anything?" He looked around at his friends, who shook their heads, before he followed Sirius.

Remus glanced at the door after he left, then at James. "So." He said.

James looked at him, eyebrows raised. "So…" he repeated.

"You and Lily, huh?" Remus said. Now that Sirius and Peter had gone, and that Claire was with Stephanie in another compartment, he could address James freely.

"Me and Lily what?" James asked, not comprehending.

"It's rather obvious that you still have feelings for her." Remus replied, retreating back behind his book.

"I do not!" James protested, but his ears suddenly grew hot and glowed pink.

"There's no point denying it, Prongs, mate." His friend said sadly.

"I do not have feelings for Lily." James repeated, pronouncing every word clearly. As he spoke, he found that he sounded repetitive. In his head at least, because these were the words that he had told himself over and over again.

Sighing, Remus glanced up at him again. "Alright." He said "Whatever you say." But he spoke in a way that made James sure that he didn't believe him.

--

"We'll be over at your house bright and early on Sunday to fix everything up." Victoria said, ignoring her mother's yelling over her shoulder as she stood with Lily at the train station.

"Bright and early." Lily repeated, quickly hugging her friend.

"And I'll make sure Anna and Lou bring all the supplies." The other two had already left with Anna's parents.

Lily nodded.

"And—" Victoria began, but her mother's cry cut across her. "Bye." She smiled quickly one last time before gathering her things and running to keep up with her mother.

Lily sighed, glancing around to see anyone she recognized. Just as she was about to come to the conclusion that she was completely alone, she heard a voice behind her.

"Hi Lily." Lily turned to see Remus standing there with a smile on his face.

"Oh, hi Remus!" she replied, smiling sincerely. She _wasn't_ alone. "Parents late?"

"Yeah, my dad's always a bit late." He shrugged, rolling his eyes. "Are your parents usually this late?"

Lily shook her head. "Not usually, but they had to uh…pick up my sister this morning."

Remus raised his eyebrows. "Sister?" he asked.

Lily nodded. "Yeah, she was in London this morning so they might've picked her up first."

He nodded, but didn't say anything. They stood there in silence before Lily looked up and spotted a wide grin across Remus' face. She was about to ask what the smile was about when he spoke.

"So." He said.

"So?"

"You and James, huh?"

Lily looked blank for a moment. "What?"

"It's obvious that you have feelings for him." He said, looking down at her.

"I-I don't have f-feelings for him!" Lily shouted, hands balling into fists at her sides.

"Just admit it."

Lily's cheeks grew warm. "No, I will not admit it because it's not _true_." She said through clenched teeth. She had a vaguely familiar feeling in the bottom of her stomach, the feeling she got whenever she told a lie.

Remus glanced over Lily's shoulder. "Whatever you say, Lily." He said, and he picked up his things. "I've got to go. My dad's arrived." He said. "I'll see you on Sunday, Lily."

Lily watched him leave, her mouth opening and closing in anger. She still looked confused when she turned at the sound of her mother's voice calling her name.

She saw Virginia Evans walking swiftly towards her and before she knew it, she was caught in a hug and then another.

"Hi mum, dad." Lily smiled up at her parents who were beaming back down at her.

Together, the Evans family set off back to the family car. Mr. Evans draped his arm over her daughter's shoulders as they walked.

"So, Lily…" he began, squeezing her arms gently. "How's school going so far?"  
Lily beamed up at him. "Great." She said. "Really great."

"Fun? Tiring? Interesting?" he pressed, then he laughed. "Come on, Lils, give us details. We haven't heard from you in weeks."

"Sorry, dad. I've been busy." She said, blushing with guilt.

"Don't worry about it, dear." Her mother said, smiling down. "But don't keep your father in suspense, dear, it isn't good for his heart. How's it been?"

Lily laughed, throwing her head back with a smile stretched across her face. "It's been interesting, dad." She said "Interesting's one word for it."

Author's Note: So, there you have it folks. Took me long enough to write. Oi. I hope you like it. I'm going to try and put up two more chapters by the end of the week, because I'm away the week after.

Thanks for reading & reviewing & for future reviews.

With love, Cait.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: I know I promised another chapter by the end of…two weeks ago, I think? And I'm sorry I didn't get to update, but I left before I had the chance to finish. Then when I got back, I was swamped with homework and catching up to do. Grr. But, I finally finished all that and was finally able to finish chapter ten. I'm thinking of typing up chapter 11 tonight, so maybe I'll be able to upload them both. Anyways, here's chapter 10 for now and I hope, hope, hope you like it.

Chapter 10: The Party

Lily was awoken on Sunday morning by a loud ringing sound from the basement.

"What in Merlin's name…" she groaned as she sat up in her bed, kicking the blankets off her legs in frustration. She yawned as she trudged across her room and down the hall. She proceeded down the stairs at a very quick pace and nearly flew right into a rather fat, purple man.

"Watch where you're going, Lily." Petunia snapped from somewhere behind the man's stomach. "You'll knock Vernon over."

"Not likely." She muttered, shaking her head. Lily peered up into the narrowed eyes of the man called Vernon. He seemed to swell in anger. "Who's ringing the doorbell?"

"As I can't see through doors, I don't have a clue." Petunia hissed. "Go answer it." With her bony hands against Lily's back, she shoved her towards the door.

"Get off." Lily snapped, but she undid the lock on the front door and pulled it open.

The rosy faces of Victoria, Anna and Louise beamed back at her.

Lily stared blankly up at them. "What are you doing?"

Victoria pushed her way into the house and the other girls followed her. "I said we'd be here bright and early." She said, the tone of her voice suggesting that it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Lily still gaped at them and in the silence, Victoria looked around the room until she stopped and jumped when she set eyes on Petunia and Vernon.

"Hello again, Petunia." She said brightly.

Looking disgusted, Petunia turned on her heel and, dragging Vernon behind her, set off up the stairs shouting, "Mother!!"

"Don't stand there staring, Lily." Anna laughed.

Snapping out of whatever thoughts she was absorbed in, Lily smiled back. "Sorry, I didn't think you meant _this_ early." She shook her head.

"Oh, hello girls." Another voice joined there. Lily turned to see her mother standing at the top of the stairs.

"Hello Mrs. Evans." The three chorused, smiling.  
"Morning, mum." Lily said, grinning as her mother descended the stairs.

"What would you like for breakfast this morning?" she asked.

Louise shook her head. "That's alright, Mrs. Evans. We've already eaten."

Virginia nodded. "Lily? What can I make you?"

"Don't go through any trouble, mum, I can make something later." Lily said.

But her mother wouldn't have that. "Nonsense, I'll bring up some pancakes and orange juice as soon as it's ready." And with that, she disappeared into the kitchen, stifling a yawn.

Lily followed her friends up the stairs and into her bedroom. She closed the door behind her and turned around to see them emptying their bags onto her bed.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked, watching her mattress disappear slowly under the heap of clothes, decorations, foods and things that she didn't even recognize.

"It's easier to see what we have when it's not all stuck in our bags." Anna said.

Lily walked over to the bed and cleared some of the stuff away so she could sit down. "What are these?" she asked, picking up a few boxes wrapped in shiny purple paper.

Louise snatched them away. "They're your Christmas presents. You can open them later."

Lily laughed but stopped suddenly. She had realized that Victoria was no longer standing where she had been.

Guessing where she had gone, Lily smiled and yelled, "They're not in there!"

"Damn." Came Victoria's reply from the bathroom where she had been looking for her own presents. She returned into the room. "It was worth a try." She laughed.

--

"Our room is off limits." Thomas Evans recited to the four girls who were seated on their sitting room couch.

"My room too." Petunia interjected. She stood in the hallway with her coat on, waiting for her parents.

"Your sister's room is, too." Her father smiled.

"Try to keep your friends from destroying things." Virginia said.

"And try not to be so loud that the neighbours complain."

"And –"

"Alright, alright!" Lily laughed, getting to her feet and pushing her parents out the door. "We know the rules, just get going already."

Mr. Evans gave her one last warning look before the door closed behind him and Lily breathed a heavy sigh. "Finally."

"No kidding, I though they'd never leave." Victoria said, nodding in agreement.

"So, is everything ready?" Lily asked, looking around at their sitting room.

"I think so." Anna said, wrinkling her nose. "All that's missing is the guests, and they should be here soon." She added, glancing at her watch.

Sure enough, minutes later, guests began to arrive in groups of two or three. They would ring the doorbell and Louise would take their coats and things upstairs to Lily's rooms. They would group together with their friends in Lily's sitting room and talk and laugh, while Anna and Louise emptied Lily's fridge and handed out bottles of butterbeer.

Thirty minutes after everyone had arrived, the doorbell rang again. Lily hopped up from her seat on the couch between Gregory Hopkins and Flora Christensen and dashed to the door. She pulled it open and was greeted with a loud "Happy Christmas".

"Right back at ch'ya." Lily said as Sirius pushed his way into her house.

"Happy Christmas, Lily." Remus said, smiling at her as he stepped inside after Sirius, just as Peter did the same thing.

Lily smiled back, but she couldn't help but let it falter a bit when she saw who followed him.

"Happy holidays, Lily." Claire said, smiling a very forced smile. James had his arm around her and he grinned at her.

"Merry Christmas, Claire."

They stepped inside and Lily closed the door after them, shutting the cold and now away.

"Nice house you've got here, Evans." Sirius said to her, leaning down to talk in her ear.

"Thank you." She said, laughing. "Please don't destroy it."

"Destroy your house? Me? Never!" he said, sounding offended, but Lily knew he wasn't.

"Of course not. Sirius Black couldn't destroy anything if he tried." Lily grinned sarcastically.

"You know me too well." He replied. "You okay with Claire being here?" he added suddenly, or maybe he had noticed Lily's stare wandering off to where she, James and another 7th year Gryffindor boy were sitting.

"What?" Lily said, looking up. "Of course. I wouldn't have invited her if I didn't want her here." She lied, not fooling anyone.

"Sure, Lily Billy. Whatever you say," Sirius said, with a quick laugh. "But I agree with Remus." He turned to join Remus and Peter on the other side of the room.

Lily knew what he meant and blushed. "Then you're both crazy!" she called after him.

For a while after that, Lily stood against the wall, occasionally chatting with a few other people but usually she just watched the rest of them. Some, the braver ones, were dancing to the music Anna had slipped into Lily's stereo. Others were simply sitting around, chatting and laughing and having a good time. Lily smiled as she watched them, pleased to know that they were enjoying her party.  
It was then that she felt a tap on her shoulder. Lily turned to see Claire standing there with her coat on.

"Are you leaving?" Lily asked, eyeing her winter attire.

Claire nodded. "I can't stay. I'm supposed to meet my grandmother for a family dinner."

"Oh, well, have fun." Lily said. "Thanks for coming."

Claire turned to the door and Lily followed her to see her out. "Thanks for inviting me." The blonde said, smiling. "And I'm sorry for treating you so badly before."

From what Lily could tell, it was a sincere apology and she felt a sincere smile light up her face.  
"It's okay. Don't worry about it." She replied.

With one last smile, Claire disappeared out into the snow and Lily watched through the window as she flung out her right hand and a great, purple bus pulled to a stop in front of her house.

Turning away from the door, Lily resumed her position against the wall for another few minutes until she felt another tap on her arm. She looked up and jumped, not even noticing that James Potter had been standing in front of her.

"How long have you been there?" she asked.

James was smiling. "Not long at all. You seemed very dazed."

Lily just shrugged, now realizing that she had been.

"Come dance with me." He said, tugging on her arm.

That woke her up a bit. "What?" she yelped, trying to get her arm back from him. "No, I don't dance."

"Sure you do, Lil. Come and dance with me."  
"I'm serious, James. I don't dance." Lily seemed frantic now. She vaguely became aware of a slow Christmas song echoing throughout her house. "I _can't_ dance."

James stopped for a minute, then laughed. "Well, then, I'll teach you."

"That's not necessary." Lily said quickly.

"Come on, Lily Billy." Lily ignored the use of her nickname. "_Pleeease._"

"James, really…"

But it was too late. She found herself standing amidst pairs of people dancing. Lily glanced to her left and saw Gregory and Flora swaying together, and on her right, Victoria and Louise were dancing together, giggling like fools.

"You know, a funny part about dancing is that you have to move…" James said, smiling at Lily.

"I told you, I _can't_ dance." Lily repeated,

"And I told you that I'll teach you." James said. He drew Lily's arms around his neck and secured his own around her waist. "Now we dance."

After a moment or so of doing nothing, Lily looked up at him. "I feel like an idiot."

He laughed. "Naw, you're very good for some one who says that she can't dance."

Lily rolled her eyes. "I _can't _dance." She repeated.

"Now you can." James snickered.

Again, Lily rolled her eyes and peered up at him to find him staring back down at her. His eyes were a light hazel colour. She had never noticed how warm they were before and she found that she was staring again, losing her thoughts in them. She had also never noticed that there were freckles across his nose. They were very faint, but now she was close enough to see them. She was vaguely aware of his arms as they tightened around her waist, and her breath caught in her throat as she was drawn closer. She suddenly felt very warm on the outside and very cold on the inside.

She fit perfectly with him. His arms, wrapped around her, felt like they belonged there and he never wanted her to move away. James saw her staring up at him and was once again struck by the brightness of her eyes, the life in them. A tingling ran from his toes to his head to the tips of his fingers, and without realizing, he lowered his face towards hers as she angled hers up towards his. He could feel the warmness of her breath on his face and he quickly closed the space between them, catching her full lips with his.

Author's Note: So…what's going to happen now? Claire apologizes for being mean to Lily, and then Lily and James kiss. You'll just have to wait and see. Haaha.

Thanks for reading, and for the reviews that I've gotten, and for the reviews that I'm going to get, wink, wink.

With love.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: So, you know how I said I was going to try and upload this chapter a few days ago, well, I didn't and I'm sorry. Haa. Forgive me? Anyway, here's chapter eleven. To me, it seems like it's made up entirely of conversations and I don't know if I like it too much. It might get edited later on, but for now, here it is.

Chapter 11: Reactions

The way his mouth felt against hers was heaven. She would have sworn that their lips were a set of puzzle pieces that only fit together a certain way, and this was the way that they fit. There was a ringing in her ears that wouldn't go away and her legs felt wobbly and weak under her. And suddenly, all the thoughts that had drifted away as soon as their lips had met came rushing back in a torrent that made her dizzy.

Lily quickly pulled away from him, pushing herself back with her hands on his chest. "I-I'm sorry…" she mumbled, bringing the back of her hand over her mouth, trying to reduce the numb kind of tingling that was there. She realized that it wasn't going away and she gripped her hair in frustration. She became aware that many people in the room had stopped and were now staring at them.

"Lily, I—" James began, but he never got the chance to finish his sentence. Lily turned away from him and had disappeared around the corner of the wall. He followed her hastily and found her in the porch, slipping into her cloak and draping a scarf around her neck.

"Lily, please wait." He called, reaching out to her, but she either didn't hear or was ignoring his pleas. She opened her front door and dashed outside into the cold, letting it shut behind her. He stared at the door, the twinkle in his eyes completely lost and replaced with nothingness.

"James! What happened?" he vaguely heard a voice behind him and he didn't answer. The voice persisted and he finally turned around to see Victoria standing there with her hands on her hips.

"What _happened_?" she repeated sternly.

"Lily left…" James sighed, blinking as though he didn't understand.

For a moment, Victoria looked like she was going to retort, but she stopped herself. "Why did she leave? What happened, James?" she asked kindly. The hurt on his face worried her.

"We were dancing…and I…I kissed her." He murmured so quietly that Victoria barely heard him. But then he suddenly looked up. "Where did she go? Will she come back?" he asked.

Victoria held onto his arm. "She probably just went for a walk to clear her head. She'll come back, James, don't worry about it…"

--

The icy wind bit at her cheeks and the snowflakes that were falling in wet clumps, soaking her, but she didn't care. She was too lost in thought to notice how cold or wet she was or even where she was and where she was going.

_How could I have been so stupid_, she thought angrily, wiping a stray tear from her cheeks. _That was the stupidest thing I ever could have done._

She regretted the kiss for many reasons. One reason was that she knew it was wrong. It was wrong to kiss him when he was with some one else, even if she didn't like the 'some one else' that he was with. Another reason was that that one kiss might have destroyed their relationship, the friendship that they had built. What if James finally realized that she had feelings for him and decided to stay away from her because of it? Lily shuddered at the thought and drew her cloak tighter around herself. And the last reason was because she had liked it, and this scared her most of all. It scared her because she liked it more than she should have; knowing that it was wrong and that it could hurt so many other people. She liked the way they fit together perfectly, the way his scent made her blood bubble. She liked the way his eyes made her feel warm, and the way that he held her hands tightly, making her feel like nothing could go wrong.

A new wave of tears shook her as she sat down on a park bench, thinking about how she could have ruined all of it.

--

"I've ruined everything, Padfoot." James whispered into his hands.

He and Sirius sat on Lily's sitting room couch. Everyone else, except for Victoria and Anna had already left. Louise had gone to visit her grandfather and Remus needed to get home before his parents started to worry. The girls were quietly cleaning Lily's house, afraid to say anything because the hurt in James' eyes made him seem so fragile.

"You haven't ruined everything, mate." Sirius soothed, staring sadly down at me.

James snorted. "Oh yeah, everything's peachy." He muttered, lifting his head to stare at Sirius. "I should have just left her alone." He added, more to himself.

"You can't change it now, James." Sirius told him. "But maybe now it would be best to stay away from her, for now, at least…maybe it's best for both of you…"

James sighed. "It might be best for both of us, but I don't know if I can do that." He said this so quietly that Sirius almost thought he was talking to himself.

Like James, Sirius sighed. "What are you going to do about Claire?" he asked.

Groaning, James put his head back in his hands and Sirius gave a humourless laugh. "Guess you don't know, huh?"  
James shook his head. "What should I do?"

Sirius thought for a moment. "To be perfectly honest with you, I don't know, James…" he said "You need to figure out what you want, and while you do that, maybe you should stay away from Lily."

James nodded. "But I can't keep lying to Claire…She doesn't deserve that…"

"Tell her the truth, then…She should understand if she likes you as much as she says she does…"

Again, James nodded. "That's what I'll do, then." He said, yawning. "I'm going to get going. I told my mum I wouldn't be too late."

"I'll see you tomorrow morning." Sirius said, getting to his feet after James and shaking his shoulder lightly. He watched as James walked towards the door before turning to help the girls clean the rest of the mess.

--

The rest of the night passed as smoothly as it could have. By the time that Sirius, Louise and Victoria had finished cleaning, it was late. Lily's parents had come home not too long after everything was tidied, but still no sign of Lily until morning when she walked through the front door.

As soon as Louise heard the door close, she jumped up. "Lily!" she exclaimed.

Lily looked up. Her face was whiter than it usually was, except for her cheeks which were a bright red. Her hair was frozen in clumps and Louise noticed that her hands shook.

Victoria and Sirius leapt up, too. "Were you outside all night?" Victoria asked.

Lily nodded slowly. "Walking." She muttered, trying to smile. It hurt her cheeks.

"We'll run a bath for you, Lily, but after that you need to explain everything." Victoria said, hurrying forward to kiss Lily's cheek before she and Louise dashed up the stairs to get Lily's things together.

Sirius smiled up at her from the couch and Lily crossed the room to join him with a sigh.

"I'm sorry." She said after a while.

Sirius looked over at her. "What for?" he asked.

"I've made a mess of everything, haven't I?" Lily sighed, leaning back. "He must hate me."

Shaking his head, Sirius put a friendly arm around her shoulders. "He doesn't hate you, Lily." He said into her ear. "He's just confused."

Lily closed her eyes and leaned against him, grateful for his warmth. "Should I say anything to him?"

It was a moment before Sirius spoke again. "Actually, Lily…I think you should keep away from him for a while and let him do this on his own."

To his surprise, he saw Lily smile, though she did it sadly. "I knew you'd say that." She said.

"Maybe it's the best thing you _can_ do." He said

"I hope it is." She said. "Because it's going to be very hard to do."

"It'll get better, Lily Billy." Sirius said as Louise called for her from upstairs. "Go have your bath," he added "And have a good holiday."

He got to his feet and turned towards the door as Lily began to climb the stairs, eager to slip into her bath and feel the scalding water cleanse her.

--

"What?" Claire said quietly, barely moving her lips. She was staring over at James with her mouth set angrily. It was the first week back from the holidays and she and James were sitting in the Heads' common room, the sun setting outside the window.

James just stared back, though he looked apologetic.

"You…y-you kissed her? You kissed Lily?" she asked, though she had heard him quite clearly the first time.

"I didn't mean for it to happen. It was stupid and I wish I hadn't." he said hurriedly.

"I think that goes for both of us." She muttered.

"I'm really sorry, Claire. And I understand if you want to keep away from me…" James said, chewing on his bottom lip.

Claire laughed dryly. "I don't want to stay away from you, James. It's not _you_ that I'm mad at."

James straightened up. "Don't be mad at Lily."

"That's too bad, James, I _am_ mad at her. I shouldn't have apologized to her. She doesn't deserve it."

"You apologized? Why?" James was momentarily distracted.

"Before I left her house. I knew your friendship meant a lot, so I said sorry, but I never should have. This is her fault."

"It's not her fault." James said, but Claire ignored him and after a moment James sighed. "Do you forgive me?" he asked.

Claire thought for a moment before she smiled lightly. "I forgive you. Just don't do it again." She leaned forward and kissed the end of his nose.

He smiled. "I won't. Promise."

It was only on her way back to the Gryffindor common room that she spotted Lily wandering through the hallways. She recognized the made of red hair from behind.

"Hey!" Claire called out, running to catch up with her.

Lily didn't turn around until Claire skidded to a stop in front of her.

"Why didn't you stop?" she demanded.

Lily just shrugged. "I didn't know you were talking to me."

"I want to talk to you, to tell you something."

Lily sighed. "What?"

"Stay away from James, do you understand?"

"Yes." Lily replied.

"If I see you near him again, I swear Evans I'll have to hurt you."  
"Okay."

Claire stared for a moment, obviously confused at the lack of argument. "I mean it." She added.

"Okay." Lily said again. "Can I go now?"

"What's the matter with you?"

Annoyed, Lily rolled her eyes. "Nothing's the matter, okay? I have no intention of going near him, so can't you just drop it and leave me alone? He's all yours. You've got nothing to worry about."

Before Claire had a chance to say anything, Lily brushed past her and continued towards her dormitory, wiping the traitorous tears away from her cheeks.

Author's Note: So, there we have it. Did Claire forgive James too easily, do you think? I wasn't sure. I was kind of thinking that she didn't really have any reason not to distrust him before that, and she knows he feels bad about it (or does he? Wink, wink), so she should give him another chance. Is that too forgiving?

There shouldn't be too many chapters left now. And then I have to start writing the sequel.

As always, thanks for reading and for reviewing.

With love.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: I can't upload chapters because I can't see my freaking story. It's making me mad. Do these things only happen to me or is it everyone? I'm just going to keep writing the chapters, and I guess I'll upload them when I can. Oi. Anyway, here's chapter twelve. Hope you like it.

Chapter 12: The Mess

Time seemed to speed by nowadays. Their last day at Hogwarts was now looming only two weeks away. Heads' meetings were now taking place nearly every night, but the teachers were involved now, helping them with preparations for the leaving ceremony. Invitations needed to be sent home to the families of the seventh year students so that they could join their children for the final feast, menus needed to be decided, decorations needed to be bought or made among many other tiresome tasks.

On top of these plans, students needed to study for NEWTS which would take place throughout the week. Nearly all the seventh years were walking around with dark circles around their eyes and their noses in a book, stifling yawns every few seconds.

And to make matters worse for James, he hadn't spoken a word to Lily since she'd left on Christmas Eve nearly six months ago and it was taking a toll on him.

He would always see her from a distance, but she never seemed to notice he was there. He missed talking to her, laughing with her, but he knew that it would be impossible to be friends with her now. He was surprised that Claire hadn't said anything about how distant he had been for the past while, or maybe she hadn't noticed.

It was Sunday night. Stars already dotted the sky and the clouds had faded into the night sky. With a transfiguration book propped in his lap, James sat out on the grounds trying to absorb the information he was reading for the exam the next morning. He felt that he knew most of it already, but the review could come in handy. He flipped the page to the next one, the number seven hundred and eighty four scrawled at the bottom of it, and was just about to read it when a distraction arrived in the form of his best friend.

Sirius sat down next to him and grinned.

"How many times have you read that book?" he asked, taking it away and closing it.

"You might not want to study, but I do." James said, snatching it back after punching Sirius in the arm.

"Since when?" Sirius said, laughing but he was instantly serious. "Moony and I have been wanting to talk to you."

"About?"

Sirius gave him a look.

"If it's what I think it's about, I don't want to hear it." James said, returning Sirius' stare with a stony one of his own.

"Oh, come on, Prongs. You've been unhappy ever since Christmas Eve."

James was quick to argue. "That's not true!" he said. "I've just been really busy."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Okay, you've been really busy," Sirius said and James grinned smugly "And really unhappy." He added and the grin vanished.

"I'm not unhappy." James said.

"Then what would you call it?" Sirius said "For six months now you haven't been acting like yourself. You smile, but it never looks like it used to. You laugh, but it doesn't sound the same. You miss Lily."

James sighed.

"I knew I was right."

"I shouldn't miss her." James said, pulling on the ends of his hair.

"Why shouldn't you?" Sirius asked. "You were friends before, why can't you be friends again?"

"Because…" James began, but he stopped to put his thoughts in order. "Because it's easier this way."  
"And why is it easier?"

"It just is. It's easier because I don't want to be her friend again."

"What?" Sirius asked.

"I don't want to be her friend. I want…more than that, but I shouldn't. I know that I shouldn't. I have Claire and she still makes me happy."  
"Not as happy as Lily made you, mate." Sirius said. "You didn't see the differences the way we did. You _glowed_ when you were with her. It was scary. Claire makes you happy, but Lily made you happy and whole." He sighed. "I know I was the one who said it might be better to stay away from her, but I was wrong. It's just made things worse."  
James groaned into his hands. "So what am I supposed to do?" he asked.

"I can't make the decision for you, mate. I just want you to be happy." Sirius said, clapping him on the shoulder. "Come on. You look like you could get some sleep, especially if exams start tomorrow."

--

_Describe the process of transfiguring a human into a lamppost. Extra marks for the incantation and wand movements._

Lily's eyes itched and burned with fatigue as she read the first question of the exam. She knew the answer. It was somewhere in the back of her mind, she just had to find it. It took a few moments before she was sure and she scribbled the answer down under the question.

The rest of the exam went the same way. She would have to search through her scattered thoughts to find the answer, but she always did. She was one of the last to finish, but she was sure the answers were right. Lily rose with a number of other students and joined the crowd outside the Great Hall.

Anna caught up to her, finishing only a few seconds after she had.

"How'd you find it Lily Billy?" Anna asked, linking arms with her.

"It was okay. Nothing too hard." Lily replied, smiling a smile that barely reached her eyes.

"Easy for you to say, smarty pants." Anna teased.

They walked out the large Hall doors and found themselves in the middle of a swarm of students. They were barely able to make their way to the staircase without pushing or stepping on anyone and when they finally got there, they hurried up the steps to avoid any other crowds.

"That was insane." Lily said, looking down at them from the top of the staircase.

"No kidding." Anna laughed. "I didn't think there were so many students at Hogwarts."  
"That's not even all of them!" Lily said, nudging Anna with her hip. "Come on, let's go."

Walking quickly, they made it to the Heads' dormitory faster than usual. Lily muttered he password and they stepped inside to find Victoria sprawled on the couch.

"What are you doing here?" Lily asked.

"I let myself in. I was waiting for you to finish." She replied, grinning as she sat up.

"Well, we're finished." Anna said, walking over to join her on the couch, just like Lily did after she dropped her books off on the desk.

"Potions this afternoon, huh?" Anna said to Victoria.

She shrugged. "They're all the same to me." She said with a smile before turning to Lily. "Did you memorize the book, yet, Lily Billy?" she teased.

Lily decided to play along. "Only the first eleven chapters." She smiled.

Anna laughed. "Lucky! I don't know anything." She said, then she sighed. "I guess I better study, then huh? Can I borrow you book, Lil?"

Lily smiled and nodded. "Do you want us to get out of your way?"

Anna stopped at the door to Lily's room and grinned back at them. "Obviously."

Victoria pulled on Lily's arm and dragged her across the common room. "Walk with me." She was saying.

They started towards the grounds, Victoria keeping a firm hold on Lily's arm. The sun shone down on them as they stepped out onto the grass.

"You've been quiet." Victoria said as she sat on one of the benches against the wall.

"Since we left the common room?" Lily asked, confused.

"No, since Christmas." Victoria prodded.

"That was six months ago!" Lily said.

"Exactly. You've been quiet for _six months_, Lily Billy. We're waiting for you to tell us what's wrong."

Lily shook her head, hair flying. "Nothing's wrong." She said.

Victoria stared at her for a few minutes before she said, "Lily."

"What?"

"Why won't you tell us?" she asked.

"Because nothing's wrong with me." Lily protested.

"Lily, don't say nothing's wrong. We're not stupid; we can tell when one of our best friends isn't happy."

"I never said you were stupid." Lily said.

"Well, you're implying it by thinking that you can fool us." Victoria said. "You're eyes are all wrong, and they have been since you came back on Christmas morning."  
"What do you mean my eyes are wrong?" Lily asked, turning on the bench to stare at Victoria.

"They're…dead. They're not as bright as they used to be. They don't shine when you laugh, or smile. They don't get darker when you're mad. They're all wrong."

Lily shook her head. "You're insane. All of you." She said, laughing in spite of herself. She rose to her feet, making to leave, but Victoria yanked on her arm.

"Lily, I am not letting you leave until you tell me what is wrong and I do _not_ care it that makes you late for the potions exam." Victoria said sternly, ignoring the appalled look on Lily's face.

"Now, what's wrong, Lily Billy?" she repeated.

Lily sat back down with her arms folded angrily, but she didn't say anything.

"Lily…" Victoria prodded.

Lily ignored her.

"Lily Billy…"

Ignored again.

"Lillian Quinn Evans…"

She raised an eyebrow this time, but still no answer.

"Lily, has it got something to do with _him_…?"

Lily looked up. "With who?"

"_Him_." Victoria repeated, but Lily still looked lost. "Don't make me say it Lily…" But when Lily just stared up at her, Victoria rolled her eyes. "_James_, Lily. Has it got something to do with _James_?"

Lily winced and Victoria smiled grimly. "I knew it."

"Do you want a round of applause?"

"No, I want to fix the problem so that you're happy again." Victoria said.

Lily sighed. "You can't fix the problem."

"Well, of course not. I don't know what the problem is yet."

"The problem is that he's not here. _And_ that I can't go _there_ because he's happy with _her_." Lily said, staring at her feet. "And you can't fix that."

Victoria thought for a moment. "You really like him, don't you?" Lily snorted and stared up at her, making Victoria laugh. "Guess so."

Lily sighed and leaned back against the wall. Victoria slid her arm around her. "It'll fix itself in time, Lily. Everything'll get better in time."

Lily looked over at her. "How much time?" she asked, smiling weakly.

Victoria smiled a similar smile in return. "I don't know, Lily." She sighed. "But there's not that much time before our potions exam. We better go."

Lily laughed. "Oh, but I thought you didn't _care_ if we were late?"

Victoria linked arms with her. "Shut up, Lily Billy."

Together, they began to walk back to the castle to make their way into the Great Hall for the next exam. As they waited behind the rows of students filing into the hall, they passed Sirius and Peter. Discretely, Victoria winked at Sirius who nodded in reply.

--

"This is a hopeless situation." Peter sighed.  
Victoria threw him a look. "The glass is always half empty with you, isn't it?"

A group of them sat together in the Gryffindor common room, squeezing around a small bench and table near the window.

"Not always," Peter argued. "But _this_ situation is _hopeless_."

Victoria shot a pillow at him.

"Be nice." Anna said, taking the pillow from Peter as he was about to throw it back.

Remus pressed on, ignoring them. "It's obviously not a hopeless situation. We _know_ that they like each other and that they aren't meant to be apart, what's the problem?"

"The problem," Sirius began "Is that Lily won't do anything about it because she thinks that James is better off with Claire and she doesn't want to hurt him. James won't do anything about it because he doesn't want to hurt Claire because she makes him happy."

"But not as happy as Lily makes him." Louise added.

Remus shook his head. "No one makes him as happy as Lily makes him. He and Lily belong together. I don't know why they have to make things so freaking complicated." He grumbled.

"It all comes back to Claire, if no one else has noticed." Victoria said, narrowing her eyes.

"She's right." Peter agreed.

"Well, we can't just get rid of her." A frustrated Sirius said, wringing his hands together in his lap. "James still cares about her. Not in the same way that he cares for Lily, but he wouldn't want to hurt her."

"Damn him and his compassion." Victoria muttered.

Louise sighed. "There _has_ to be a way to fix this." She said.

"But what is it?" Anna asked, looking around at the rest of the group.

"I don't know." Remus said. "But we _have_ to think of something. We can't just let them…_not_ be together."

Sirius sighed. "I don't know, but it's late. We should get to bed. We still have exams tomorrow." He got to his feet stretching his arms over his head and yawning widely. "We'll keep thinking, but who knows…maybe this whole mess will work itself out…"

Author's Note: Alrighty then. There's no Claire in this chapter, which can be either a good thing or a bad thing. I don't know. I'm pretty sure there'll be a excess of her in the next chapter, but no promises. (:

Thanks for reading. Let me know what you think.

With love.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: How long has it been since I've uploaded? A year? Maybe two? No, it just feels like it's been that long. It's insane. I'm really sorry about the slow update. I was grounded during the summer, and then school started and I had all this homework to do. But hopefully I'll be able to start updating a bit more, now. I'll try my best, anyway. Besides, the fic is almost over.

But then I have the sequel to work on, right? Right.

Chapter 13: The last trip.

The sun shone brightly in through the windows of the school. Birds could be heard chirping from somewhere far away. When Lily sat up and peered out her window, she noticed that there wasn't even a cloud in the sky. It was the perfect Saturday morning, even better than usual because it meant a break from the exams they'd been having all week, the exams which would continue over the next one as well. It was just the right kind of day for their last trip to Hogsmeade.

Without even bothering to stretch or yawn, she dashed into the bathroom and turned on the shower. She tried to be quick, lathering shampoo into her hair, but she just couldn't rush through the shower. The heat of the water pounded onto her shoulders but it was soothing and relaxing and she had to slow down and enjoy it.

Once the warmth had unclenched every muscle in her body, she stepped out and draped a towel around herself so that she could brush her hair and teeth and dress before she left the bathroom. Finally, once she had finished, she walked out of the bathroom, swung her bag over her shoulder and with one last glance out her window, she walked down to the Great Hall to join her friends for breakfast.

She found Louise and Victoria sitting at their usual spot at the end of the table. They weren't eating, however. As Lily drew closer she saw that they were poring over a muggle fashion magazine, one from the bottom of Lily's trunk.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked, sitting down across from them and eyeing them.

They ignored her.

"Hello?" Lily said, frowning. She pulled the magazine away from them and quickly read the headline. _Ten things to know if YOU want to set some one up._

"Setting some one up?" Lily asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Louise flushed, but Victoria didn't falter. She snatched the magazine back. "Just muggle rubbish, Lily Billy. We're only reading it for fun."

"Sounds like _so_ much fun." Lily laughed.

"So…Last Hogsmeade trip ever." Louise said. Lily guessed she was trying to change the subject.

Lily sighed. "That's true."  
"Well," Victoria said, taking a brighter side to the conversation. "We better make it a good trip, then."

"What should we do?" Louise asked.

"I don't know." Victoria shrugged. "We'll figure it out as we go."

"We're leaving soon?" Lily asked.

Louise nodded. "And I think Professor McGonagall said something about staying an extra hour or something."

"Good. The longer the better." Lily grinned.

Victoria smiled. "One more week."  
Lily nodded. "One more week." She agreed.

--

"Are you sure you don't want to spend the day with your friends?" Claire asked as she and James walked out of the Great Hall. "It _is_ the last trip."

James smiled and squeezed her hand. "I'm _absolutely _sure."

Claire smiled back, obviously satisfied. "What do you want to do?" she asked.

"Whatever you want. Maybe we can walk around, then go for something to eat?" James said with a shrug. They caught up to the back of the line of students and followed the slow moving crowd out of the school.

"That sounds fine with me." Claire said. "I don't care where we go, as long as the _we_ is still a part of it."  
James grinned.

The village of Hogsmeade seemed to be absorbing the sun. It was always a beautiful place, a warm and familiar place, but today it seemed even better than usual. Students were rushing around, laughing and chatting and just being happy to be away from their studies for a day, but none of them look more pleased than the seventh years, for this was the last trip they would ever take as students to the village, and they were determined to enjoy it.  
After walking around for a while, admiring the main street of Hogsmeade, James and Claire settled down at a table in the back of the Three Broomsticks. James bought their drinks from the counter and brought them back to their table, placing one in front of Claire and another in front of his seat before he lowered himself into it across from her. She smiled in thanks before taking a sip, and when she looked back up, she found that James was staring at her, half a smile on his face.

"What?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow.

James laughed and shook his head. "Nothing, nothing." He said. "I was just thinking."

Claire put down her drink. "You've been doing that a lot lately. What are you thinking about?"

He sighed. "A lot of things. Exams, leaving Hogwarts, us." He elaborated.

"Us?" Claire asked.

James nodded and she looked as though she'd have liked to know more, but she decided not to ask and said, instead, "What are you doing after Hogwarts?"  
Again, James sighed. "I don't know. That's mainly what I've been thinking about, but I can't seem to make up my mind." He then smiled. "But I suppose I've got a bit of time, right?"  
Claire nodded and smiled back.  
"What about you?" he asked.

Still smiling, she took another sip of a drink and only answered when she put the drink back down on the table. "Journalism." She replied. "I'd like to work for the _Prophet_, but I think they only take the top writers."  
"You'd be good as a journalist." James said. "I think the _Prophet_ would take you, maybe not right away but they would eventually."

Claire smiled and shrugged. "I hope so."

James downed the last of his drink and pushed the empty bottle aside. "Shall we keep walking?"  
Claire nodded, already finished with her drink and got to her feet. James took a few steps forward before he stopped and waited for her to catch up. Once she was beside him, he put his arm around her waist and pulled her up against his side as they left the Three Broomsticks and set off down the street again.

--

Past the main shops and pubs and crowded roads of Hogsmeade, a little further even than the Hogs Head, was a small patch of grass under a towering tree whose branches hung low and stretched far. It was here that Lily and her friends found comfort. There was a red and white blanket stretched out underneath them and a small wicker basket in the middle of the circle that they formed. There were also several bags around them, filled with their purchases from earlier that day and each of them were holding their own sandwich in their hands.  
Victoria snorted through a thick mouthful of hers. "You can't be serious." She said once she had swallowed.

Anna laughed. "I am. The wedding's this summer, and I've been asked to be a bridesmaid, can you believe that?"  
Louise covered her mouth to stop the giggles there. "No, I can't. I can't even believe that there's some one out there willing to marry him."

"Oh, come one. He's not _that_ bad." Lily said, rolling her eyes.  
Anna stared at her. "'Not that bad'? Lily, this is Calum we're talking about. My _brother_. The one who told me that I wouldn't be able to get through the barrier on the platform my first day because I was too small."

Lily laughed. "Alright, I get it."

Anna sighed. "But you'll all come, right?" she asked, looking at all of them. "To the wedding?"

Victoria nodded, speaking for the others as well. "Of course. You think we're going to leave you all alone in an awful bridesmaid's dress?"

"Of course not." Louise said, and they all laughed again.  
"But you might have to pay us." Victoria added, wiggling her eyebrows.  
Anna shook her head. "I'd be willing to. Without you guys, this thing is going to be a nightmare."

They continued eating in silence for a while, simply enjoying the company and the change of scenery. None of them could believe that this week was going to be their last week at Hogwarts, the school that had been their home away from home since they were only eleven years old. They couldn't believe that after this week, they would be out of school, having to make their own decisions, having to really live their lives. It was a scary thought.

--

"Shouldn't we be getting back now?" Claire asked, watching as the rest of the students filed into a disorderly line behind the caretaker, ready to go back to the school for the night. She looked away for a moment, and peered up at James, who still had his arm tightly around his waist. She was surprised to see that he had his trademark grin on his face, that one expression filled with such a great amount of mischief. She couldn't help but smile back.  
"What are you thinking?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"What do you mean?" he asked, feigning innocence, but he laughed when she gave him a look that made it clear that she didn't believe him. "Come on." He then said, letting go of her waist and grabbing her hand instead, dragging her along after him as he walked away from the crowd.

Claire looked confused. "What are you up to?" she asked. "The line to go back is the other way."  
"I know." James smirked.

"We're not going back, are we?"  
Still grinning like a fool, he shook his head. "Not right now, anyway. We're for a walk."  
Claire stared at him. "We just went on a walk."  
"A different walk."  
"Different?"  
James ran a hand through his hair. "Well, the same kind of walk…in a different place. Come on."  
Though she had no idea what the strange boy was up to, she followed him as he took off in a different direction than the rest of the students.

--

"Where are Potter and Austen going?" Louise hissed to Victoria as they caught up with the departing crowd. She made sure her voice was low enough so that Lily didn't hear.  
Victoria narrowed her eyes, and stopped twirling the strand of hair that she had woven around her finger. She wrinkled her nose as she spoke.  
"Beats me. But I'd bet my best shoes that whatever they're up to, it's not good for our plan to fix the James and Lily problem."

Author's Note: Well, this chapter was pretty short, pretty uneventful, and the update was reallllly slow. So, my bad. But I promise the next one will be loads better. At least, I hope it will be.  
Thank you for reading. Read and review, please and thank you.


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: It feels kind of weird writing again, and updating again. Like I'm not used to it, and I forget what I'm doing. It's quite strange.  
Anyway, like I said, I'm going to keep trying to upload a bit quicker. I started this chapter right after I finished the last one, so I hope that's quick enough. If the last chapter wasn't as great as the others, I'm pretty sorry. It's been a while, and I guess I'm a little rusty. But enough with the excuses, on to the chapter.

Chapter 14: Differences

The sun was beginning to set. If the village had been beautiful before, then it was beyond description now, as the red and orange hues of the sunset settled over the quaint little houses and shops. It seemed still as a muggle painting. Few people were out and about now, as opposed to during the day when the little village was so full of life. People, they guessed, were settling down now, enjoying their evenings.  
The only two people that seemed to be moving weren't even in the village anymore. James and Claire had continued down the main road of Hogsmeade until they had left the town behind. The road had diminished into a path that wove through an emerald meadow, with trees on either side. The grass was high, but there were places where it seemed that others before them had flattened it to the ground, to make the perfect place to sit. James took Claire by the hand and led her off the path, to one of these said places and sat down.

"So _this_ is what you were up to, hmm?" she asked, laughing as he pulled her down next to him.  
"I couldn't just give it away." James grinned. "What kind of surprise would that be?"  
"A pretty lousy one. I'm glad you didn't tell me." Claire answered, then she looked puzzled. "But how exactly are we supposed to get back to the castle?"

James laughed at her expression. "Don't worry about that. I'll get us back before they notice we're gone."  
"One of those little Marauders' secrets, is it?" Claire asked.

James nodded. "Yep. And I'd tell you, sure. But then we'd have to kill you."

"So what, are you going to blindfold me on our way back?"

"I might have to." James said grimly, but he couldn't keep his smile from spreading across his face, and as though it was contagious, Claire grinned back at him.

"So, why did you bring us here?" she asked, twirling a strand of hair around one long finger.

James shrugged. "We don't really get much time to be on our own, do we?" he said. "I thought we could, you know, just sit here for a while, away from everyone else."

Claire smiled and let her hand fall from her hair. She leaned forward, closer to him, her face barely inches away from his.  
"It was a good idea." She said, still smiling as she pressed her lips against his. She lifted the arm that she wasn't leaning on and brought it around his neck, fingers in the ends of his hair as she pulled him closer to her.

James put his arm around her waist and threw himself into the kiss just as she had, parting her lips with his tongue. Slowly, supporting her back with his hand, he lowered her into the grass, hovering just inches over her. He pulled away, and heard her whine in protest, but his lips didn't leave her skin. He simply moved them down the line of her jaw to her neck where he tested her soft skin with his teeth, along her collar bone, feeling her shudder underneath him.

But something was wrong. The two of them lying in the grass fit together, gripping each other fiercely, but there was something off about the space between them. Like there was enough space there between the bodies to let air pass through, and that wasn't right. They didn't fit together like puzzle pieces that had found their neighbours. They were like the pieces that _looked_ like they'd fit together, the right shapes, the right sizes, but they never did. There was always something off.

And there were no shivers under James' skin, no chill of pleasure that suddenly swept over him and knocked his train of thought of the tracks. He felt exactly as he had felt before. Nothing had changed, but it _should_ have.

The worst part was that he knew what was wrong. He pulled back from her and saw that her wide eyes were staring up at him. Hazel eyes, not emerald ones, and they were narrowed in confusion as James sat straight up and put his head in his hands.

Without looking up, he could feel that she had sat up too. He felt her hand on his shoulder, and heard her voice as she spoke softly in his ear.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her face bent towards his.

"I'm sorry." He muttered, refusing to look at her. "I can't do this."

A moment of silence passed, and he couldn't avoid looking at her anymore. He lifted his head and glanced at her; found that she was still staring at him. But there was a sad smile on her face, which he thought was odd.

"It's because I'm not _her_, isn't it?" she asked.

James didn't have to ask. He knew who she meant, and she was right. He didn't have to answer, either.

"I had a feeling that was it." Claire said, and she gave a quiet, humourless laugh.

"I'm sorry." James said again, because he meant it.

"Don't be." She said, still with her hand on his shoulder. "I guess I knew it all along, but I didn't want it to be true. She makes you happiest, and I just want you to be happy, James." She paused, waiting for him to say something, but when he didn't, she continued. "You're in love with her, and she's in love with you. I'm not going to stand in the way anymore. I know when I've lost."

"You're handling this really well." James said, one eyebrow raised.  
Claire laughed. "I guess I am. Like I said, I just want you to be happy."

"Don't say that." James groaned, hitting his head on his uplifted knees. "I don't deserve it."  
Claire got to her feet and grabbed his arm, pulling on it. "Don't say that," she said. "Everyone deserves to be happy."  
James stood up with her. "What about you, though?"  
"What about me?" Claire laughed again. "Don't worry about it. I'm tough. I can handle it."

James raised his eyebrows again, suspiciously.  
"Really." She said, nodding and pulling on his hand as she started walking back towards the village. It was dark now, and she found the path they had taken by feeling around with her feet. "Now are you going to lead the way? I don't think the blindfold is really necessary. I can't even see my own feet." She grinned.

James squeezed the hand of hers he was holding, and pulled her close enough to his side so he could kiss her temple lightly.

--

The boys' dormitory was dark, and quiet. Well, almost quiet. The occasional grunting snores that came from Peter's bed made James smile as he felt his way through the room. Other than Peter's, though, from as far away as he was, he couldn't tell whose bed was whose. There was one empty one, and two others that were occupied, but by whom he couldn't tell until he drew closer. It was only then that he saw that one boy was neatly asleep under the covers, and the other was lying half off the bed, the blankets drawn up over his head. Sirius.  
He made his way to this bed slowly, so as not to make any noise. He was careful where he put his feet, to avoid the creaking floorboards. He crouched beside Sirius' bed and gently shook him by the arm, achieving nothing. James shook him harder, but Sirius just groaned and kicked his legs, rolling away from him. James rolled his eyes and jabbed the other boy hard in the ribs.  
"What?" Sirius moaned, turning his head.  
Even in the dark, James could see that his eyes were narrowed. "I have a dilemma."

"A what?" Sirius hissed.  
"A dilemma. A _problem._"  
Sirius sighed. "And you couldn't just say that in the first place, because…?"  
"Not the point."  
"So, you have a problem? What else is new?"  
"Ouch." James whispered, making a face.  
"What do you expect? Waking me up in the middle of the night to tell me that you have a problem…" Sirius said.

"It's over with Claire."

Sirius sat up. "Why didn't you say that?" he asked, running a hand through his sleep-tousled hair.

James shrugged.

"I don't get it, though. What's the problem?" he asked.  
"It's over with Claire." James repeated slowly, as though he was talking to a two year old kid.

"Again, not getting it. That doesn't sound like a problem to me. Now you can go after Lily without any complications. Isn't that what you wanted?"  
"Yes, that's what I wanted." James hissed. "Okay, so I guess my problem is more that I don't know _how_ I'm supposed to go after Lily."

Sirius adopted a higher voice, one that James took to be his. "Hi, Lily. I'm in love with you and I was an idiot to stay with Claire so long and now I want to go out with you."

James narrowed his eyes. "Yeah, that's a great approach."

Sirius was quiet for a moment. "Go ask Moony. I'm too tired for this."  
"I'll ask him in the morning." James said, standing to his full height again and crossing the room to his old bed. He pulled the blankets back and crawled in, setting his glasses on the table next to him.  
"Oh, sure. Ask Moony in the morning. Wake Sirius up in the middle of the bloody night." Sirius whispered angrily, lying back down and dragging the blankets over himself again.

James laughed quietly. "Night, Padfoot." He said softly.

"Night Prongs."

--

Lily awoke the next morning to the sound of footsteps outside her bedroom. She sat up in her bed, red hair everywhere after a long night of tossing and turning while strange dreams rampaged through her head. She quickly smoothed it down the best she could and swung her legs over so that her bare feet hit the chilled floor. Groggily, she stood and crossed the room to the door and pulled it open. She was surprised to see Claire there, fully dressed and primped so early in the morning, pacing across the floor.

The blond girl stopped pacing when she saw the sleepy looking Lily standing in the doorway. She smiled shyly, while Lily just looked confused.  
"Can I help you?" she asked, squinting as the sun shone in from the common room window.

"Uh…not exactly. I…wanted to talk to you, that's all." Claire said, biting on her bottom lip.

Lily nodded, eyes still half closed. "Come in." she said, turning back into her room. She could hear Claire following behind her.

"Sorry that I woke you." She mumbled sheepishly.

"Don't worry about it." Lily yawned, going to her dresser to fetch her hairbrush, and she began to attack the mess on her head. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Well, I wanted to talk to you about, uh, James, if that's okay." Claire said, sitting on the end of Lily's bed.

"What about him?" The last time they had 'talked' about James, Claire had threatened Lily to stay away from him, or else. She was suddenly apprehensive.  
"I just wanted to say that you won."  
Lily's eyebrows shot up. "I won what, exactly?"

"James. You won the fight for him, I guess you could say."  
"I wasn't fighting, Claire." Lily said, walking over to sit next to her on the bed.

Claire laughed. "Well, I guess you could say that, because you never really _had_ to fight. He's always been crazy about you, and I'd bet that he'll always_ be_ crazy about you. There was never any competition."

Lily stared at her. "What are you trying to say?"

"We broke up, because he's in love with you." Claire said, trying to make it as simple as possible.

"Oh."

Claire nodded. "I just thought I should tell you." She shrugged. "And I wanted to, uh, apologize for everything I've said to you, and everything I've done. I wanted the year to end on good terms for us. If you can forgive me, that is."  
"Of course I can." Lily said.

Claire grinned. "Thanks, Lily. It's easy to see what he sees in you. You're a really great person, and I'm really glad we can be friends."  
"Me too." Lily smiled.  
She watched as Claire got to her feet and left the room without another word. She could hear the portrait hole closing behind her. Lily herself rose and replaced her brush on her dresser, staring at her reflection in the mirror that hung there. Confusion was everywhere on her pale face, and she walked off to the bathroom for a shower, thinking that this had probably been the oddest morning she had lived through.

Author's Note: There's only one more chapter to go. It'll for sure be up by the end of the week. I'm going to try and make it as good as possible. And I think in another week and a bit, I should have started the sequel.

As always, read and review, please and thank you.


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I own next to nothing.

Author's Note: Last chapter; I hope it ends alright. There may be a few edits later on if I change my mind about it, but for now, this is how it's going to stay. Enjoy.

Chapter 15: Endings and beginnings.

Why is it that the things you wish were over, always seem to last so much longer? And the things you wish lasted forever go by so fast that you'd miss them if you so much as blinked?

Seven years had gone by too fast. It seemed like only yesterday that they first walked through the giant doors of the castle, eyes wide and taking in all the wonders that made Hogwarts what it was. The ceiling in the Great Hall that seemed to stretch out as far as the real sky did, just as magnificent, just as astounding. The decorative suits of armour that moved and spoke, and pointed them on the right paths to their classes when they would get lost on the ever changing staircases. The ghosts that glided through the air, and told stories from decades ago, when they had gone to Hogwarts and how things had changed, and others that have always been the same. The plates upon plates that magically filled themselves up with food, in a hall filled with students just like them, waving their wands and casting spells; all the wonders of a world that they never would have thought was possible.

But there they were, seven years later, sitting at the Great Hall the same way they always would, though today something was different. None of them could get it out of their heads, that this was their _last_ day.  
"Did you pack?"

"No."

Lily frowned at Victoria across the table, who was leaning forward, supporting her lolling head with her hand.

"Don't look at me like that, Lily." She said, wrinkling her nose.

"We're leaving this afternoon." Lily replied quietly.

"I know." Victoria sighed, and her head slumped forward, banging against the table.

Louise, sitting next to her, gently patted her shoulder. "We packed her things," she mouthed to Lily, who nodded.

"It's going to be fine, Victoria." Anna said. "Weren't you always the one saying that you couldn't wait to live your life? To get out in the real world and be completely and utterly free?"

Victoria lifted her head. "Yeah." She grumbled.

"Well, you're getting your chance."

"We're all going to miss this place, Vicky." Lily said. "This place and everyone in it."

--

Upstairs, in a brightly lit dormitory, Sirius was taking the same attitude that Victoria had adopted downstairs: Denial. They couldn't actually be leaving for good, could they? It couldn't really be over?

"Come on, Padfoot." Remus said exasperatedly, pulling on the boy's arm in frustration. Peter stood on the sidelines laughing.

"I'm _not_ getting up. I am _not_ leaving." Sirius said from in his bed, where he was lying under his blankets, refusing to move.

"Yes, you are." Remus said firmly. "We all are, and you've got to get up _now_." He heaved again on his arm, with as little success as before. He had already tried to convince Sirius that it wasn't as bad as he thought it was, and he had failed. He had given up on the conciliatory approach, and had taken a firmer route.

"No." Sirius stated, not budging.

His things were already packed and stacked neatly by the door, thanks to Remus and a few simple waves of his wand. The only thing that was missing was the boy himself.

"What's going on?" Came a new voice to the argument. With a puzzled smile on his face, and his eyebrows slightly raised, James stood in the doorway, arms folded and he was leaning against the frame.

"Now you're in for it." Remus said to Sirius, before turning to James. "He refuses to get up. He doesn't want to leave." He explained.

James laughed. "Come on, Sirius." He said, walking over to the bed and sitting on the end. "You knew we had to leave. Besides, you always said you hated having people tell you what to do. That there were too many rules in school, anyway. And now you're leaving, getting set free, and you don't want to get out of bed?"

"I lied." Sirius said. "I need a little structure in my life."

"That's what you've got us for. Now get up." James said, getting to his feet and folding his arms over his chest.

A moment passed, and then another, but finally, there was movement from the bed as Sirius slowly rolled over and sat up even more slowly.

"Progress." Remus said, nodding.

"All the way up, Padfoot." James said, and he watched as Sirius grudgingly got to his feet.

"We really have to leave this place behind, don't we?" He said sadly, casting one last look around the dormitory as he started to pull a pair of pants on.

"Yeah, we do." Remus said with a sigh that sounded just as sad.

"This doesn't have to be a bad thing." James said, trying to take a positive outlook on the situation despite the similar sadness that was surging inside him. "Think of it as a beginning, and not an ending."

Remus stared at him and he just shrugged.

Sirius' head poked through the hole of his shirt as he pulled it on, and he wriggled his arms into the right places. "Did you talk to Lily yet?" he asked, smirking at James.

He scratched the back of his head idly. "Not yet." He muttered.

"What are you waiting for?" Remus asked as he pushed him toward the door.

James, who didn't actually have an answer, let himself be forced out of the room. His heart felt heavy with the knowledge that he was about to do something very important; that he was about to tell Lily exactly how much she meant to him.

--

Lily left her friends, promising to find them again before they had to leave to catch the train. Unthinkingly, her feet led her down the assorted hallways, her eyes admiring the different portraits along the walls. A smile spread across her face in response to the waves she was getting from the witches, wizards and other creatures in the frames. It seemed like everyone realized that it was their time to leave.

She hurried up one of the staircases at the end of the hallway, and walked past the library, the place where she had spent so much of her time with her face buried in the pages of a book. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of the Heads' common room, the fat old man in the painting before her beaming down.

"You were a fine Head Girl this year, Ms. Evans." He said, inclining his head.

Lily smiled. "Thank you."

And without asking for the password, he swung forward and Lily climbed into the common room. Once inside, she took a moment to admire the room once again, the different shades of gold and scarlet in every decoration, before she strolled into her room. All of her belongings were stacked in a neat pile by the door: her trunk on the bottom, then a box of books and her school bag was thrown on top of it. She pulled her wand out of her pocket and gave it a wave and watched as her things sprung to life and began to quietly float themselves out of her room and back out into the common room. She glanced around the room one last time, sighed, and followed her baggage out the door. The sight of her trunk and school bag fighting to fit first through the portrait hole made her laugh, and she hurried forth to fix the problem, holding one back to let the other pass, and they continued happily down the hall once again. Lily trudged behind them, stalling. She wanted to spend as much time in these hallways as possible.

--

"I wanted to tell you this sooner, but things were just so complicated, I –"

"Lily, there are a lot of things that I've wanted to say to you, and I never knew how to say them –"

"I've never felt like this with anyone before, not even with Claire, not even close –"

"When you're not around, it feels like there's something missing –"

"You make me feel different, Lily, happier than I've ever –"

If he had been heavy enough, there would be a hole in the floor of his bedroom from where he had been pacing since he'd been kicked out of the Gryffindor common room by his friends. If he had been speaking louder than the muttering he'd been doing, he'd have a sore throat. That's how long he had been practicing his speech. That's how important this really was.

Groaning and gripping his hair in frustration, he crossed the room to his bed and threw himself down on it. Why couldn't he just say exactly what he was feeling? Just let the words flow out how they wanted? Wouldn't that make it sound more real? But he knew exactly why he had to rehearse it: because he wanted everything to be perfect.

There was suddenly noise coming from outside his bedroom. This surprised him; he thought for sure that he was alone, that everyone else was already getting ready to leave for the train station. He got to his feet and ventured to the door to investigate, pulling it open and peering through the crack. It looked like a trunk and a book bag were fighting to get through the opening of the portrait hole. James quirked an eyebrow, confused, until he saw some one hurrying after the quarrelling baggage. The quick flash of red hair was familiar, but he realized it a second too late.

"Lily, wait!" he called, dashing out into the common room, but the portrait had already swung shut behind her, and James stood there quite alone, one hand stretched out towards her, but she had slipped through his fingers again.

But why was he still standing there, reaching out as though he could bring her back? It took him a moment or so to get his feet to once, but once they started, they didn't stop. As fast as he could, he took off out of the common room.

"You'd better hurry, before she gets away for good, my boy." He heard the portrait saying from behind him, quickening his pace, and James Potter was practically flying through the empty halls.

But when he got outside, his eyes widened and he felt his stomach drop at the sight of the queue of carriages, and the swarms of students trying to board them.

"You have _got_ to be kidding me." James muttered to himself, running a hand through his windblown hair. But his disbelief and frustration were cut short when he heard some one shouting his name.

Peter was pushing his way through the throng of students, panting with the effort.

James went to meet him.

"Padfoot and Moony are saving us a carriage." He explained, nodding his head back from where he came from. "Why are you so out of breath?" he added, looking James up and down.

James sighed and shook his head. "Come on," he sat, pushing Peter back through the crowd. "We'd better get back before some one decides to take our places."

--

Space was limited with the four of them squeezed inside the carriage, but somehow they managed. Lily was pressed up against the side, next to Anna, while Victoria and Louise were sitting across from them.

Three of the four girls were immersed in conversation. Lily however was immersed in her own thoughts, which seemed to be everywhere at once.

There was sadness in the mix, because she knew she was leaving her second home for good. Because she knew that she would never be going back to Hogwarts, the place that made her see that things like magic were really true. Because she knew there were people here that she would never see again, and it hurt to know this. It hurt to know that the friendships she had built would have to end, some, of course, more than others.

Confusion was also on the menu, and it was this that took up most of the space in her head. Mostly, it was one question that she kept thinking over and over, and her thoughts were trying to answer it, and failing. Why hadn't he talked to her yet? She knew that the last week had been busy, chaotic, and that she had only seen him in passing. But wasn't it important anymore? He wasn't going to tell her himself that he was still in love with her? Unless it wasn't true.

_No,_ Lily told herself firmly._ I believe Claire. She wouldn't do that._

Unless he had changed his mind.

For this, Lily didn't have an argument, because it he _had_ changed his mind, there was nothing she could do about it. The possibility pained her though. She hadn't realized how deeply in love she had fallen with James Potter, and the idea that he didn't love her back anymore was excruciating.

_But if he did change his mind,_ Lily thought, _I'll have to accept it and try the best that I can to move on. If it makes him happy, it will be okay._

Before she knew it, the carriages had stopped. Lily heard Victoria groan.

"This can't be happening." She sighed, getting to her feet first and sliding gracefully out of the carriage.

Louise followed her, tumbling not-so-gracefully after her. "It's happening."

Anna was next, then Lily, who closed the door behind her.

The younger students were already dashing toward the Hogwarts express, excited to be going home. But they would be coming back next year. It was obvious that the seventh years were stalling, because they were the last ones on the platform.

"I'm really going to miss this place." Lily said, glancing wistfully at her surroundings.

"We all are." Anna said, throwing her arm around Lily's shoulders, making her smile.

Slowly, they began to walk towards the train.

--

"You have to help me find her." James said as he clambered out of the carriage.

"She can't really be that hard to miss, mate. She's tall, with red hair that kind of sticks out." Sirius said, as he, Remus and Peter hurried to keep up with him.

James apologized and excused himself as he pushed his way through the crowds, keeping an eye open for a mane of red hair that, like Sirius said, would probably be the easiest way to find her in this mass of slow moving students.

"James!" he heard Remus calling his name, and he turned hopefully. The brown haired boy was pointing in the opposite direction where, sure enough, he spotted her, slowly moving towards the train with her friends.

Within a second, he was gone, sprinting off in the direction Remus had pointed out.

"Lily!" he called, raising his voice above the hustle and bustle. Several people turned to stare at him as he hurried forward, yelling. "Lily!"

He watched her stop, and turn to see who had called her name. And still as he ran, he was struck again how beautiful she looked, even from this distance, with the sun beating down on her, her fair skin glowing.

Panting, he skidded to a stop in front of her, and he heard her friends promise to see her soon before they disappeared onto the train.

"You're impossible you find, you know that." James said to her, putting his hands on his knees for a moment as he caught his breath.

"Sorry." Lily said, watching him. A moment of silence passed, and she watched him straighten back up to full height as she spoke again. "What did you want to find me for?"

Impulsive. That's how his next actions could have been described. But the way she was looking up at him, her eyelashes fluttering as she blinked, the way her lips were already parted erased all logical thoughts from his mind. He closed the distance between them in one step and leaned down to her level to capture her lips with his own. His hands were gentle, one softly on her waist, the around on the back of her neck, holding her close to him. James was struck again by the feel of her lips against his, how soft they were and just the taste of them. He melted as he felt her arms move, her hands trailing up his chest and around his neck. He could feel her pull herself up onto her toes, completely returning his embrace. There was no space between them, no room for air to pass through their bodies. This was the way the puzzle pieces fit together.

After what seemed like forever, and still not long enough, he pulled his mouth away and took one step back. Silence filled the gap; the two of them were oblivious to the swarms of students moving around them.

"Is..uh…" Lily began, trying to get her scattered thoughts in order. "Is that why you were looking for me?"

James stared down at her. "Not exactly, uh…" he stammered. "I have something to say to you."

"Oh?"

"Yeah," James grabbed her hand and pulled her away from the train, away from the crowds. "Okay," he took a deep breath "Lily, I – I'm going to put this as simply as possible, because if I try and make it sound good, it's just going to come out wrong. I love you, Lily. More than I've ever loved anyone in my life, and I think I always have. When you're not around it feels like something's missing, and then when I find you again, the missing piece falls right into place." Another deep breath and his voice shook when he started again. "I – I've always wanted you, Lily, and only you. I've always wanted you, I always will want you and I want you right now, so much it scares me."

Silence crept up again, and Lily stared up at him, digesting the words he had said to her. The words themselves made her heart fall to her feet, but the way he said them, speaking with such emotion, made it fall right through the ground. Then bold as you please, she threw herself at him, arms tightly around his neck drawing him down to her height. She could feel his surprise in the way that he kissed her, but it soon disappeared and the love he had spoken of replaced it, soft and warm.

She pulled away from him and saw the broad smile on his face and couldn't help but smile back.

"I've been waiting a while to hear you say that." Lily said, reaching for his hand and holding it tightly in hers.

"I've been waiting a while to say it." James laughed, and he leaned down and lightly pressed his lips to her cheek.

"Yeah, Prongs!" a voice shouted from one of the train's windows.

James looked up. Sirius, Remus and Victoria were hanging out of one window, Peter, Anna and Louise out of another. They were all smiling, all laughing.

James laughed too, Lily right along with him, and hand in hand they boarded the Hogwarts Express for the last time. But suddenly, the idea that this was their last journey home didn't seem so bad because, together, they could handle anything. And they _were_ together…finally.

Author's Note: So, that's it. The last chapter. The grand finale. I hope, hope, hope it was okay, and I hope you liked it. Thank you so much everyone who's read my first story, and thank you everyone who's reviewed. I have a hundred reviews now, more than I ever thought I'd get, and it makes me very happy.

I'm starting the sequel by the end of next week, for those who are interested. It's going to be called I Need You, and I've already got most of the plan down.

Thanks again, and I hope you enjoyed the story.


End file.
